Meet to discuss current constitutional issues at the ARTICLE 121 CLUB every Thursday at 7 p.m. 6 Gospitalnaya Ploshchad. Upcoming topics include land reform and presidential term limits.

Do you often wake up hung over and unaware of the name of the man next to you? Join ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS and you're guaranteed to lose the hangover and always know his first name. You are only ten steps away from breaking your dependence. Daily meetings. Call 768-2551.

Enjoy fixing Ladas? Next time you see somebody working on his car by the side of the road, offer a hand. He's probably a member of MECHANIC ENTHUSIASTS GUILD eager to discuss the fine-tuning of the Russian automotive industry.

Want to be able to learn to block hostile projectiles? Or simply be more like the president? Join the MOSCOW JUDO CLUB and learn how to flip, kick, and generally increase flexibility. For information, call 933-7700.

Join BIG BROTHERS OF MOSCOW! Adopt a needy Russian youth and spend some QT with him. Whether you see him every day or just once a week, every little bit of your time will make him feel wanted and needed. Multiple adoptions are possible. Call 243-9621 for info.

GAYS FOR JESUS (nondenominational) hold services at 11 a.m. Sundays at the Gagarin House of Culture. 29 Presnensky Val. We work to bring down the walls that prevent our Christian brothers around the world from embracing each other.

Come visit the ALL-RUSSIA BANYA SOCIETY. Hygiene fanatics of all ages are invited to be beaten with branches or simply let off some steam. To find out more about our daily happenings, call 952-5895. S lyokhkim parnyem!

KITAI-GOROD NEIGHBORHOOD ASSOCIATION meets on the park strip by Staraya Ploshchad every day in all kinds of weather. Get to know your neighbors and help tighten the fabric of our community!

A world without mothers? Learn more about the possible applications of new cloning technology. Every week MGU GENOME CLUB ponders the practical and philosophical implications of the latest advances in biology. 924-2424.

RUSSIAN PRIDE brings together men who are proud to live in Russia. Anyone who takes pride in Doestoevsky, Mendeleyev, or the Red Army is welcome to join like-minded thinkers at 69 Ul. Vavilova every Tuesday at 7:30 p.m.

Tired of being cooped up in a closet-sized space all week? Every Saturday, walkers and hikers gather for NATURALIST SOCIETY expeditions around Moscow. Call 753-3010 to take part in our outings!

SALIVATION ARMY CHURCH gives God a rim-job every Sunday at noon. 60/2 Ulitsa Bolshaya Ordynka.