[SIC!]

E-mail us: editor@exile.ru

DZHUNGL FEVER

Mr. Higgins,

Being the informative expat that you are i was wondering if i could get a few nuggets of info from you. This summer, I’ll be spending a two weeks in Moscow to visit a classmate of mind. She says that I will love Russia and all that, but I happen to be 1/2 blk and have heard a few disconcerting stories about black travellers being harassed in the former republics (especially Ukraine). Do you think that I will encounter any problems, and if so, what should I expect? I’m college age and have a muscular body, but so did the marines who got killed/attacked/?? recently. I’m not loud or obnoxious, so I defintely won’t be starting anything. I deffinitely look AMerican as opposed to African though. Thanks for yoru help.

Steve

FRANKLY SPEAKING

Dear Editors,

Congratulations are in order. My dear boys, you have achieved the level of mediocrity not often matched by your colleagues. And you have done it all by accident, which means there is an angel looking over your dandruff filled hair, that is those of you who have hair. Judging from the few photos of you, it seems you have plenty of hair left, although not entirely on your heads. But enough of my witty comments!

The real issue is the taste of semen. Whether it is a horse or some other poor mammal you selected for your dirty work, the taste of semen is a lot more than the taste of semen. It is as if you suddenly discovered that aspic was not just fruit jello but a boiled derivative of animal joints. It is more than acidic taste, it is the taste of degradation. A taste of moral degradation and physical dominance. Just like the Slavic princess blowing a huge Mongol cock in full submission to his savage glory.

By the way, while we are on the subject of genitalia, I have thoroughly enjoyed the twin-twat Kurnokova. All the lads at the club thought it to be quite a riot.

I have thought it would be, as you say “cool” to have one of your much coveted tee shirts, but you realise that I would never stoop so low as to ask the likes of you. Instead I propose a barter - my luscious Sulka bathrobe, with golden tassles in exchange for one Exile shirt in mint condition. When those Slav beauties get a look at your hairy backs in perfect Sulka silk, their “snappers” will be rapping Ave Maria. How about it, you silly cunts?

Kindly yours

Frank McCormick

STAIRWAY TO HEAVENS

Do you know what’s happened to this Matthews character? I went out with him for several years at university. I smile, or rather grimace, at the memory. His sister Emily was a right pain in the arse. And as for his parents!

Louise Heavens

Equities Reporter

BridgeNews

120 DAYS OF SADAAM

While i’m boring in Paris, I use to re-read my eXile collection in the toilets. Guess what article I found by chance ? Limonov’s advice on man’s ages. #03/109 p.6 “Listen to the voices, man.” Nature’s voice joking with right-wing anarchists, giving one (the mediocre writer Leo Mallet) the opportunity to fuck better at 50, while funny Limonov eats the bone in jail. He just expected the best “sacred seven years cycle” of his life would have had started this year 2001 ! Please offer him a pen, and russian litterature will have an opportunity to break off with usual depressed nevrotic writers. Hail the new russian Marquis de Sade !

Best wishes.

Emmanuel Grynszpan

FRIGHT CLUB

Privet!!!

I am a grad student at Michigan State University who is working on a MA in Russian Language and Literature. For a late Christmas present, I received your book “ The eXile” and loved it. Are your issues available on the Internet or is there another way I could get a hold of your paper? As the new President of the MSU Russian Club, I feel that we need some contact with Americans in Russia. After reading about the exploits of Mark Ames and Matt Taibbi; my reaction was that I had to attempt to contact the eXile.

Instead of the usual boring and rehashed news, an alternative viewpoint would revive this Club... in my humble opinion. (It may cost me my presidency, but what the hell is life without taking some risks?) If your staff is interested in communicating with our club (we do have native Russians here who would freak after a few pages in your book....) and giving both of our organizations connections on the other side of the Atlantic. We are in contact with many Russian Clubs at various universities in the US and it would be awesome to put us all together.

I have been to Pskov, but never to Moscow... not yet. I am looking forward to hearing from you and perhaps you could be guest columists in our monthly newletter. Maybe I could even write a column for your paper. Nothing major, but it would be an experience.

Look forward to hearing from you,

Edward Nerowski

President

MSU Russian Club

MARTIAN MULE WEENIE

i don’t know what happened, but you guys suck big green donkey dicks lately.

did the paper get sold, are you all on vacation?

adios exile.................

Strac4oh@aol.com

FLOUNDERING

Mark,

I was wondering if you have any advice for someone who’s looking to move to Russia for awhile in terms of a job life or what ever. I live in San Francisco now and plan on making the move in the fall when my lease runs out. Any advice hints would be greatly appreicated.

Thank you,

Bob Aubrey

REPTENANT NAZI

Subject: Apology for Mr. Tannenbaum / Email notification

Hi!

Please do not list my email address in the future.

I have since apologized to Mr. Tannenbaum for my anti-semitic comment. I thought that he would appreciate my candor and would not take offense at the word ‘jew’. Apparently, this was not the case.

So, please pass along my most heartfelt apology and please be so kind as to not list my email address again.

Thank you and best regards,

JH

JGH000@aol.com

KONFERENCE-HOPPING KRAUT

Hi,

I’m working for a small German newspaper and just went to a conference called ‘Im Schatten der Macht’ (‘in the shadow of power’) about the media in Russia. It was organiszed by the ‘Deutsche Welle’ and the ‘Friedrich-Naumann-Stiftung’. Despite some intresting stuff told by the Russian journalists, the main point of the conference was how much this German Organizations are helping the Russian medias. Ayway, since I used to live in Boston for while I read your book and just was asking me, if you could give me some more information about the situation of the Russian media and, maybe, about the relationship of the western journalists to the Russian Media and stuff like that.

Thanks a lot,

Tobias

CHILDREN STINK

Hi Mark

Why do you hate children?

I can follow you much of the way in almost anything you write (althougt I somtimes tend to agree with a [sic] letter you got the other day witch mentioned how maybe you shouldn’t think so much about making a revolution and conquering the opinon-building establishment and rather just ignore it and carry on with your thing, wich is so far superior to the average fare in the media these days, rather: to everything in the media these days) but when it comes to your baby bashing my understanding (although not my appreciation or tolerance or whatever) ends...

Is it just dark nihilism, or did you just understand more of this whole shit than I do?

If you won’t answer unless I send my name just let me know and I’ll send it to you,

best regards

and man, I never knew there existed other people that think the way I do, let alone would build a magazine around it,

Peskall,

somwhere in Europe

BLAME MELLE

What can I do? Almost a fan letter.

I made a long-range but fairly brief trip across Russia in the spring of 2000. I travelled from Shanghai to Portugal by independant train travel. Being from Western Canada I found a lot of things to appreciate in Russia. Many similar scenes, architecture, people and attitudes.

One of my great discoveries in Russia was your rag. Doing my work and travels I have read press releases disgorged as news in many locations. (Some of the worst examples occur in California where I now work). You are on my weekly checklist of sources for world news. You can certainly not be accused of being lame or bland.

After my return, I made occasional slogs through your web site. As time goes on I find my self returning more often to peek behind the html covers. Just when I think that I should rush out and praise you to the world you manage to say something juvenile, racist, dangerous and sexist all in the same sentence. I can not even bring myself to praise you at my

BadChoice.com web site...

The thing that real surprises me about your on-line edition is the occasional flashes of brilliant insight. I learned more about the craft of journalism from your recent March Madness that I would learn from a year of Brill’s Content. But then you go right completely bonkers and over the top. I can not image a more disgusting fate than horse sperm pie. That will disturb my dreams for years to come.

So now the reason of today’s letter: What can I do to help? I am not paying for my Exile reading. How do you earn money to keep your self on-line? I can’t imagine any serious company advertising in your yellow journal. What unwritten Kremlin secret do you know that keeps you

out of jail? What can I do to help Mr. Limonov? Who should I write to? How can I contribute?

Finally please fire young Mr. Higgins. You don’t need to send a sophomore lad out to do a man’s job. As much as I enjoy reading about Russian snatches there must be a lot of volunteer writers with some journalism skills to take on that task. As a 48 year-old overweight computer geek I would certainly volunteer to spend my nights getting laid and reporting on the results. How much do you pay him?

You can sign me BadChoice Canuck if you decide to publish some of this message. I know that it would certainly not help to request “Off the Record” status.

Gregory Melle

I READ GOETHE

To the Editors:

The last article on Limonov claimed that he is ostracized for actually walking the rebel walk, not just talking the rebel talk. While the evaluation of the liberal establishment, who rebelled long enough to join the power club, is right on the money, not so is reasoning as to the animosity Limonov inspires among them.

Limonov is a nationalist and the Left is deeply suspicious of nationalism not espoused by the weak: Vietnamese, East Timorians, Bosnians or Chechens. To quote Martin Van Creveld, everything the weak does to the strong is perceived as justified, nothing the strong does to the week is perceived as justified. By fighting against Bosnians Limonov appeared to be beating on the underdog, and it is only human to be for the underdog.

Would the European Left ostracize Limonov for fighting in Nicaragua against the Contras, in Bosnia AGAINST the Serbs? It would be more than anyone of them could ever master: in Nicaragua they did not go further than volunteering at the coffee plantations, in Bosnia further than hanging at Sarajevo hotels. He still would have shown them “how far they never went”, but would have received from them admiration and envy currently granted him by “The Exile”.

And is it surprising that the extend of Limonov’s condemnation is directly proportionate to his commitment to the “wrong” cause? Someone criticizing affirmative action would never be condemned as severely as someone dragging a black man behind his pick up track ( and this is exactly how Limonov looked like to the Left when videotaped shelling their holy shrine- besieged Sarajevo. He might have as well joined the cops beating Rodney King).

I can think of another romantic anti-establishment figure who went to the Balkans to fight for Christians against Muslims-Lord Byron.That Limonov went there expecting to be despised rather then admired makes him a different Byron, a Byron with a Russian soul, to use Lermontov’s expression.

But Goethe said that men of reflection should not strive to be men of action and visa versa. By ignoring that advice Limonov, a great writer and an inept revolutionary, has become a direct opposite and a caricature of Ernesto Che Guevara, a mediocre writer and a great revolutionary. Limonov is a man of reflection and as such is much better at diagnosing the illness than finding cure, leave alone practicing medicine. He proposes to replace the current regime with a Stalinist dictatorship seemingly oblivious to the fate that most certainly awaits him and his idealistic followers under such a regime. Even under kinder, gentler Stalinism practiced in the late Soviet Union Limonov was thrown out of the country. Under the real Stalinism he at best will be driven to suicide like “the Poet of the Revolution”, a great revolutionary propagandist Vladimir Mayakovsky. My guess is that Limonov preaches Stalinism precisely because it may never triumph again, yet wants to be taken seriously at the same time! The impoverished, militaristic statelet of Prednestrovie, for whose independence Limonov fought, is the closest thing to National Bolshevism and the best argument against it.

The grotesque politics of Limonov underscores Marx’s point that history repeats itself twice, first as a tragedy (as in 1917-[D.M.]), then as a farce (as in 1993-[D.M.]). That an eccentric figure like Limonov gets to champion Bolshevism and nationalism reveals more about today’s Russia than about Limonov. He got this part by default of Zuganov,a phony Bolshevik, and Zhirinovsky, a phony nationalist. As a revolutionary Limonov, in comparison to Mayakovsky, is precisely what Zuganov is when compared to Lenin.

And should any challenge to “the Suits” be welcomed? That a corrupt bourgeois regime may be overturned by a hurricane, with subsequent ascend of a “Caesar”-a Stalin or a Mussolini, may be welcomed by a Marinetti or a Limonov, but not by the rest of us. Tim McVeigh certainly showed American “patriots” how far they never went; Unabomber did the same for radical environmentalists.

We must not forget that Geobels himself played around precisely with the idea of National Bolshevism, until rebuked by Hitler. If National Bolshevism is to move away from the fringe into mainstream, then it will most definitely become racist, for sadly racism is almost all left of the sense of nationhood in today’s Russia(earlier Mark Ames himself illustrated the total apathy and indifference of the population by pointing out that the defeat in the First Chechen War actually strengthened the regime that started the war).

Mussolini started with inclusive nationalism much like Limonov, but eventually went down Hitler’s racist path.Limonov himself never condemned genocide against Chechens or Colonel Badanov. His allusion to lieutenant Calley and MaiLai village in “The Exile” column only shows that he is smart enough to understand what is going on, yet cynical enough to ignore it.

Further, Limonov’s innate vulnerability that is a large part of his literary fame makes him totally unsuitable as a political leader. If he is all left of the opposition, then “the Suits” have nothing to worry about- they have won. Limonov’s emergence as the face of the opposition would be a direct testimony to their ability to bribe, intimidate,and otherwise co-opt those who could have done real damage.Hence, Limonov’s probable upcoming incarceration, while a personal tragedy, would hardly be a loss for the Russian politics, but, if he turns to letters, may be a huge gain for the Russian literature.

Dmitry Marin

dmitrylaw@hotmail.com

Oakland Park, Florida