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Fatwah / August 13, 2009

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Matthew Vadum, the rightwing butterball savaged in The Daily Show last year for race-baiting, doesn’t like me very much. But he ain’t the type who keeps it to himself. Nuh-uh. America’s favorite little waffendwarf read my last post about him, and fired back an email that can only be described as “Chihuahua-esque” in its yapping-factor. Behold:

from: Matthew Vadum <mvadum@capitalresearch.org>
sender-time: Sent at 5:10 PM (GMT-04:00). Current time there: 12:43 AM. ✆
to: ames@exiledonline.com
date: Mon, Aug 10, 2009 at 5:10 PM
subject: Apparently, you are illiterate.

Ah, another fascist-loving Eurotrash wannabe. So tedious, but to each his own.

It’s clear you know a lot about cocaine.

Apparently, you are also illiterate.

On the “Daily Show” segment that aired, I said “community organizers use crack cocaine in exchange for votes.” I didn’t say on the show that ACORN did so but the Wall Street Journal made the allegation Nov. 3, 2006 at http://www.opinionjournal.com/editorial/feature.html?id=110009189.

I hope you get the help you need.

MATTHEW VADUM

Senior Editor

Capital Research Center

1513 16th Street NW

Washington, DC 20036-1480

Ooch! Ouch! Down, boy! Bad midget! Shoo!

Now some of you might think it’d be better to just ignore Vadum–and believe me, I would if it wasn’t for the fact that Vadum is doing his best to ruin us all. Vadum is a regular guest on FoxNews, specializing in smearing ACORN. And all that work smearing ACORN has paid off in spades: as he boasts on his think-tank website, the Mad Midget was even cited on page 292 of Michelle Malkin’s book! Not page 293 or page 291 like us regular schmoes, but page 292, folks! That was a proud moment indeed. Vadum was also one of the early promoters of the rightwing lie that Obama’s health care reform will mean gassing grandma and grandpa. In a June 25th blog headlined, “Obama Wants To Let Those Pesky Geezers Die,” Vadum summed up President Obama’s health care reform this way:

So, old people: screw you. In the future Uncle Sam will put you on an ice floe and let you float away to your heavenly reward. It gives new meaning to the Latin phrase “Dulce et decorum est pro patria mori.” (In English, How sweet and glorious it is to die for one’s country.)

So you can imagine that I didn’t take his poison emails lightly. But after reading this last one, I realized that Vadum unloaded a bizarre pastiche of accusations at me, that unfortunately canceled each other out: I mean, calling me a “fascist-loving Eurotrash wannabe”? What’s wrong with just calling me “Eurotrash”? That’s painful enough, if only because it cuts so close to my Eurotrash bone. But “fascist-loving Eurotrash” is an oxymoron, and “Eurotrash wannabe” just doesn’t make sense. There is no “wannabe” subset of Eurotrash, because they’re all wannabes. If you wannabe Eurotrash, you’re Eurotrash. All you gotta do is be one of those cheesy “I love to dance and party” sexually-ambiguous fashion victims always Voguing for the camera, and…Here, let me show you an example, like this guy:

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H’m, wait a minute. He looks familiar. Forget it, try this guy here, look how he’s surrounding himself with fag-hags:

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Nice tats, dude–Whoa! Wait a doggone cottonpickin minute. I know that guy! Hey…that’s Matthew Vadum! And yet… You don’t look like a Mad Midget here. You look more like Truman Capote, with a set of George Washington teeth. Tres cool! In fact there’s a whole video slide show of Matthew Vadum with different chicks, and the video used to run to the song “I’m Too Sexy” until YouTube removed the sound. Wasn’t “I’m Too Sexy” a huge Eurotrash dance hit? Hey, I just realized something: Matthew Vadum is a rightwinger who likes to party and dance and take photos of himself with women…which kinda makes him a fascist-loving Eurotrash wannabe! Too eye-rah-nik for words, ain’t it?

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25 Comments

Add your own

  • 1. Bernard  |  August 14th, 2009 at 1:13 am

    I really hope people keep sending you letters because I love these articles.

  • 2. captain america  |  August 14th, 2009 at 3:55 am

    i like sucking cock

  • 3. Mark  |  August 14th, 2009 at 5:05 am

    This brings back memories of the good old days of reading the Exile. It’s great that you’re now in a target-rich environment!

  • 4. Ashley Schaeffer  |  August 14th, 2009 at 5:13 am

    I would pay substantial amounts of monies to see Ames and the mad midget in the same room.

  • 5. Mish  |  August 14th, 2009 at 6:08 am

    The pics of mad midget from the 80s are too good to be true.

    You should do these as audio pieces. The one where you come after Kudlow shows how much more goddamned hilarious they are with intonation.

  • 6. chance mcgee  |  August 14th, 2009 at 6:29 am

    Any idea as to whether Terrence Scanlon is related to Michael Scanlon, the Delay/Abramoff crony?

  • 7. X  |  August 14th, 2009 at 8:38 am

    Beautiful, Mark, just beautiful. Please keep up the excellent work.

  • 8. s.  |  August 14th, 2009 at 11:00 am

    This is absolutely wonderful.

  • 9. Aaarrggh  |  August 14th, 2009 at 12:13 pm

    A progressive with balls. You’re my new role model, sir.

  • 10. Rob  |  August 14th, 2009 at 2:38 pm

    Why is everyone in Anglo-Saxon politics either hideous, freakish or both?

    The sooner we get some soveriegn democracy the better: porn stars in the Parliaments and a shirtless Putin clone living it up like the virile fuhrer. ‘Til that happy day, keep on breaking the debating society rules these freaks enforce with the exquisite old eXile style on display here!

  • 11. Flozzi  |  August 14th, 2009 at 9:48 pm

    Mark,

    I am amazed you invest so much time in writing personal attack articles. The result is beautiful (and superbly researched, it seems), I am just worried that you might be wasting your talents.

    That said, can we suggest targets for such write-ups?

  • 12. captain america  |  August 14th, 2009 at 10:41 pm

    lol

  • 13. withnail  |  August 14th, 2009 at 11:39 pm

    Loved the Starship Troopers reference. Of course the important point of ST is this: the bugs were the good guys. (Did I read that here?)

    The Mad Midget would probably have felt right at home wearing SS uniforms with Doogie Howser and raping brain bugs for fun.

  • 14. no he's not  |  August 15th, 2009 at 4:32 am

    If Mark Ames is a “progressive” then I’m a chile relleno. A lot of progressives make a living oozing contempt for the natives? He’s more of Republican Kurtz gone off the reservation.

  • 15. Juhi  |  August 15th, 2009 at 8:45 am

    Anyone else notice that Amanda Carpenter wasn’t wearing white to her own wedding? Looks like someone wasn’t as big a proponent of abstinence as the rest of her fellow right wingers.

  • 16. hyperbolus  |  August 15th, 2009 at 11:47 am

    In short, a fascist world. He accuses you of being Bruno, because he wants Bruno, wants to be Bruno. If only you would agree to meet him in Central Park after dark, he’d be your very best friend.

  • 17. WE  |  August 15th, 2009 at 4:55 pm

    Fucks like Vadum are simply mercenaries, they are far less defined by actual beliefs than greed and pathological antipathy for the other. What people like him, Glen Beck, Rush Limbaugh, Ann Coulter and the rest of the talk radio/think tank cabal have in common is that they are laying the foundations for civil war, though if war/civil uprising actually comes to pass they will be playing the entertainment we never intended to promote violence card right up until the end (unless their side wins of course, then they’ll be having Keith Olbermann skull fuck parties in a bathtub full of Coulter’s piss). Vadum doesn’t look like a stranger to speed addled prostitute strap-on fucks, just wait for the video, if it could happen to Larry Craig, it could happen to you.

  • 18. jajagenau  |  August 16th, 2009 at 3:58 am

    Hitchens at 1:30. Who’s that at 1:54? He doesn’t seem to be too thrilled sitting next to Vadum.

    What I find strange about Carpenter’s wedding is how empty the church seems to be.

  • 19. Larry Craig  |  August 16th, 2009 at 8:30 am

    Somebody just tap me an invite? Which stall?
    Vadum, you little hunka achondroplasiac buttbait, that was you, wunnit? Jeez, man….

  • 20. par4  |  August 16th, 2009 at 10:45 am

    Waffendwarf,you should copyright that one.

  • 21. blowback  |  August 16th, 2009 at 12:21 pm

    Haven’t you got any photos of Matthew Vadum with Brigette Bardot and Jane Fonda ‘cos he was married to both of them (not concurrently of course) back in the day?

    What about a picture with Pamela Artless Juggs, the Ayn Rand wannabe?

  • 22. Palmer Eldritch  |  August 22nd, 2009 at 11:12 pm

    I cannot understand what it is that causes so many perpetually adolescent slow learners from the conservative movement to squat on and around the classics as they do.

    Somehow, it seems that they get the idea that a guy with a weak personality and no intellectual talent can bull his way to a reputation for subtlety and erudition by dedicating himself to the study of Latin and Greek, and peppering his speech and writing, (and arms?) with italicized quotes.

    However it happens, every Classics department seems to have at least one Vadum type haunting it at all times, and in prose comp he never fails to write a poem about how thankful he is to his father.

  • 23. Jyp  |  August 23rd, 2009 at 4:39 pm

    Oh. He’s a fucking midget. I thought he was standing there with a couple of really tall skinny broads. Like models or something. Well, a non-homosexual Republican! Holy shit! And Ames.. “Eurotrash”.. huh? I thought Mark was some kind of frat boy CIA line rider, ie., way out there on the edges of their turf, possibly going half-rogue or something. Someday the Company will have to send a Captain Willard out to the Big Giant Head in the jungle to correct a defection. No? Aw, you guys rock.

  • 24. Anonymous  |  August 27th, 2009 at 6:36 am

    Oh, beautiful. The man who, a short while ago, was castigating you for your malicious personal attacks on McArdle is now calling you a “fascist-loving Eurotrash wannabe.”

    What an asshole.

  • 25. skinny welsh git  |  August 31st, 2009 at 3:04 am

    He is bloody marvelous, is Mark. But he’s no Jonny Chen.


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