Issue #15/96, August 3 - 17, 2000  

CRASH DUMMIES

Although the eXile’s new Lo-Kontent format prevents us from elaborating, we are forced to note: a news story broke last week which gave the press a chance to reveal itself at its absolute ugliest.

It wasn’t just that the whole world freaked out and demanded front-page news for more than a full week when 100 rich Germans died in a freak accident on the Concorde—and this after twice as many penniless Filipinos died in a landfill slide, of all things, and barely cracked the “In Brief” sections of most Western dailies for even one day.

It wasn’t just that the very first (the very first!) wire service reports about the crash coldly noted that “Shares in Air France ended down 3.5 percent at 19.3 euros on the Paris bourse” (Reuters, 2:52 ET, Tuesday, Jul. 25).

And it wasn’t even that the wires, while adopting a tone of horror and empathy with the victims, felt it fit to describe the “horrible acrid smell” of burnt bodies detectable for miles around the crash site (AP) and the “flipped like a pancake” motion of the plane as it went down (Reuters).

No, what brought the international press to a new low with this story was its celebration of the two backpacking Hungarian retards who took the now-famous picture of the plane as it went down.

It was roughly 14:44 GMT when twentysomething Hungarian boltheads Andras Kisgergely and Szabolcs Szalmasi took their famous photograph, while pursuing their miserable hobby of watching airplanes from their car.

Less than a full work day later—seven hours and 46 minutes, to be exact—Reuters reporter Gary Regenstreif, in a story that hit the wires at 5:30 EST, rewarded the two young men with a brief cum-shot of fame for their help in providing the international media with their photo. In his profile, entitled “Key Concorde Photo Snapped by Eager Airport Buffs”, Regenstreif celebrates the two as eager young whippersnappers who earned a brief place in the big time through sheer pluck and determination:

“Most visitors to Paris first rush to the Eiffel Tower, the Champs Elysee or the cultural wonders at the Louvre museum... But two young Hungarian airport buffs.. opted instead for the unglamorous Charles de Gaulle airport and got more than they bargained for when a Concorde airliner crashed in a ball of flames... [Their photograph], obtained by Reuters, was flashed to media subscribers around the world and earned a little place in air travel history.”

The article went on to describe the vacation plans of the two young men. In a heartwarming “personal” touch, Regenstreif included a yuksy reference to the fact that the pair had already seen a different crash at an air show last year.

‘``Wherever he goes there is a crash,’’ Szalmasi said half jokingly. ``I will not fly with him.’’’

On top of all this, Reuters saw fit to publish a photograph of the two men posing, like proud gay parents, with their famous picture [See below].

The bodies of the passengers were still sizzling long after these two had fully completed their journey from zeroes to heroes. One can only imagine what a relative of the victims might have thought if he had seen Regenstreif’s story that day. Actually, one can do more than imagine this, as we found out by tactlessly calling the Reuters office in London (44-207-250-1122):

Reuters: (American voice) Hello.

eXile: Ja, my name is Wilhelm Klink, I am calling from Hamburg. I vish to complain about a story of yours about ze Concorde crash. Zere vas a story called “Key Concorde Photo Snapped by Airport Buffs”, written by Gary Regenstreif out of Paris, zat vas very hurtful. You see, my granfater vas on zat plane.

Reuters: I’m sorry to hear about that. Uh, you see, it was put together by Paris, and uh, I understand how you must feel, I understand that it must be difficult.

eXile: I am very hurt. It vas insensitive to make fun of Germans like zat. A story about some Hungarian hippies right after ze crash. Are you ze editor?

Reuters: No, I just work at the news desk. If you want to complain, you can write a letter to the editor.

eXile: No, I. Vell, can I speak to ze editor?

Reuters: He’s, uh... he’s out for the day.

eXile: Vhat’s hees name?

Reuters: Uh... could you hold on a moment?

[Several minutes of muffled voices, panic]

Reuters: Hello.

eXile: Yes, I vant to complain about a story of yours. You are ze editor?

Reuters: (British voice trying desperately not to sound annoyed) Yes, I am.

eXile: Vhat ees your name?

Reuters: Robert Mahoney.

eXile: Unt my name is Wilhelm Klink, I am calling from Hamburg. My granfater vas keeled in ze Concorde plane crash, and I found an article of yours vhen I vas in Paris zat vas very insensitive, and I vant an apology.

Reuters: What exactly was the article’s problem?

eXile: Vell! Zere vas zees article literally just a few hours after ze crash [...].

Reuters: It wasn’t meant to be insensitive. It was just a story about a couple of Hungarians.

eXile: Ja, but it made fun of Germans. Of course you can make fun of Germans vhen zey die in plane crash, but you wouldn’t publish cute article about Hungarian hippies who always snap photos of airplane crashes if zees plane crashed in New York vis Americans on board!

Reuters: Yes, but I don’t think that he knew the passengers were German. It wasn’t a story about the passengers, it was a story about the Hungarians.

eXile: No, you all just zink zat ve Germans are all Nazis, so you laugh vhen ve die. But ve are not all Nazis.

Reuters: But you see, it was just a story about the Hungarians, that’s all.

eXile: But it vas insensitive! Ve are not all Nazis! Okay, so my grandfater vas a Nazi, but he vas only following orders. It’s not as if he vas killing Jews, you know. And he apologized for his activities.

Reuters: Sir, I see your point. I understand that you must be upset by what happened, and you’re sensitive to this. If you want, you can write a letter to the editor.

eXile: No, I vant an apology!

Reuters: (sigh) But we... I can give you an address to write a letter.

eXile: Ja! Vell, maybe ve should send more V-2 rockets into London, zen ve see who’s laughing!

[eXile hangs up]

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