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Broke the Koch Brothers' Takeover of America

Cowboys and Aliens is a big mess, sure, but I don’t know what everybody’s screaming about, it’s still better than most of the other maggoty offal they’ve been serving at the multiplex all year long. Apparently critics exhausted themselves praising Captain American—that rancid stew of Nazi-busting WWII cliches warmed over and served up to us for the zillionth retching time!—and now they’re cranky and ready to pan the hell out of something.

If you’re going to enjoy Cowboys and Aliens at all, of course, you have to be in the mood for a Western, even one scrambled together with sci-fi ingredients like we prefer nowadays. If you don’t want to see horses galloping past mesas, and men frowning over glasses of whiskey in dusty saloons, and gunfights and cactus and all that, skip the whole thing.


July 31st, 2011 | Comments (23)

13 Assassins: Beautiful Bloodsome Samurai

Finally got around to seeing 13 Assassins—couldn’t face any of the new film releases this week—and I can’t tell you how soothing it is. It’s a reverent throwback to the great 1950s-’60s Japanese samurai films, and it’s done in neutral shades of gray and white and tan and black. Other than the copious blood spray, of course…

May 30th, 2011 | Comments (17)

Rango: Cartoon Philosophy and Death

Rango is this crazy animated movie about a lizard in a state of existential crisis. His tale is narrated in song by a mariachi band comprised of four owls, and they sing about his imminent, heroic death throughout. Rango keeps…

March 5th, 2011 | Comments (24)

The Warrior's Way Challenge: Can You Stand It?

There’s a new movie out called The Warrior’s Way, and it’s flopping like a doomed fish. It was so unpublicized I wouldn’t have known it existed, except I was hunting through the movie openings for the week in my dogged way….

December 8th, 2010 | Comments (17)