Hoveround: The Tea Party Death Mobile

Class War For Idiots / April 14, 2011

By Mark Ames

It’s all about making tough choices fer our granchirren’

To all my fellow under-55-ers: If you want to know why we have to fund the over-55-ers’ full Medicare and Social Security benefits, leaving nothing for the rest of us, here’s your answer: All those taxes have to pay for today’s Tea Partiers to ride around on these Hoverounds. That’s right, if there’s one thing Boomers can’t stand, it’s not being able to chase us around the house while hectoring us about fiscal responsibility. Thanks to the Hoveround, there’s no way we can escape from their narcissistic deficit-hawk blather.

Here it is: You can run…you can walk…you can crawl even. But you can’t hide from the Hoveround:

Read more:, Mark Ames, Class War For Idiots

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29 Comments

Add your own

1. Aaron | April 14th, 2011 at 4:24 pm
Technicals.
2. Duarte Guerreiro | April 14th, 2011 at 4:57 pm
Oh shit, its Tom Kruse!
Holy fuck, foam AND springs! Thats some space age tech right there.
I hope when I get this old and incontinent I still have the self respect to off myself, set an example fer de granchirren’.
3. Baron | April 14th, 2011 at 5:46 pm
Somehow I am reminded of the Baron from Dune and his floaty chair thingey.
4. vortexgods | April 14th, 2011 at 7:14 pm
Best Ribs!
5. Whyawannaknow | April 14th, 2011 at 8:08 pm
If you had the courage of your convictions, you’d be dead by now.
6. Soj | April 14th, 2011 at 8:43 pm
Ribbing, Rocking and Wheeling!
7. Machingunner | April 14th, 2011 at 10:09 pm
Is it just me or are Americans starting to look like Jabba the Hut?
8. wengler | April 14th, 2011 at 10:40 pm
Foiled by stairs.
9. furioso | April 14th, 2011 at 11:32 pm
i think exile should have 2 perpindiculer rows-sice war nerd is now daily-
10. Suzanne Somers | April 14th, 2011 at 11:36 pm
THAN KYEU THIGHMASTER!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TkeG8SGnLfU
Scroll to the 50-second mark.
Oooohh . . . haahn haaaahhnn . . . .
11. Aaron | April 15th, 2011 at 3:20 am
wengler: EL-E-VATE…EL-E-VATE…
12. Aaron | April 15th, 2011 at 3:21 am
Seriously, any Davros wannabes in the audience, here’s your perfect subject population. Hell, you might be doing them a favor.
13. Costco | April 15th, 2011 at 6:16 am
“welcome to Carl’s Jr.!”
“would you like another extra BIGASS FRIES!?”
14. Trevor | April 15th, 2011 at 6:32 am
Baron (#3) is absolutely right. I have been getting the feeling lately that Harkonens are running everything…
15. franc black | April 15th, 2011 at 10:14 am
I saw one at the mall … backed into a small child, then the rider started cussing out the parent for not being more careful.
16. Ganryu | April 15th, 2011 at 12:01 pm
At least you don’t see this in the 3rd world. Seriously, how does that guy in the picture pee? He couldn’t possibly find his penis under all that lard. God, if these Hutts/Harkonens thought Obamacare was going to be bad, wait til real Repugnican austerity kindly let’s them know that their Mississippi medicare block grant was gone for the year and they’re out of luck. I wonder how much longer a fat corpse stinks vs a skinny one?
17. Yueh | April 15th, 2011 at 12:41 pm
Duke Obama will know that it is I, the Baron Harkonnen, who encompasses his doom.
Sinister Laught: Bwah-ha-ha!
18. Bane | April 15th, 2011 at 1:59 pm
This is retarded beyond belief. 🙂
19. Baron | April 15th, 2011 at 7:44 pm
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0jSPcQNy6uk&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HfWfd3RgN6Y
Now we just need a shirtless Sting to pose for a lusting Koch (lol) and the cycle shall be complete.
Oh, and sandworms also need to drive out the US Forces in Iraq and Afghanistan.
20. SweetLeftFoot | April 15th, 2011 at 8:19 pm
LOL. I like it Ames.
21. CensusLouie | April 16th, 2011 at 4:11 pm
Oh man, anyone who has every worked in a grocery store, drug store, or any retail that offers bulk candy, knows the sight of these things.
Each such store has clockwork regulars like the guy in the picture: obese, elderly Jabbas who ride through the candy aisle several times a week stocking up for the next assault on their pancreas. They usually arrive in their retirement home/assisted living van. The most disgusting was one who was waiting for their ride, not caring that her pee bag was leaking all over the sidewalk because she was too busy scarfing down tootsie rolls.
We rock paper scissored to see who would go out to help her =(
22. Nick | April 17th, 2011 at 12:23 pm
Slobstopper.com
23. an | April 18th, 2011 at 3:32 pm
Who pays for these people?
Taxpayers? Why? Why keep them alive?
24. anon | April 19th, 2011 at 9:50 pm
At the upscale natural grocery store I work at there’s one of these… she has a stench that reeks of cat piss (and worse) that trails behind her for about 30 feet. I gagged last time she came into the store.
America is so fucked.
25. izzy | April 22nd, 2011 at 3:30 pm
Must be a lot of air pressure in those tires.
26. photonX | April 22nd, 2011 at 3:33 pm
Looks like he swallowed the air bag.
27. Kyesh | April 25th, 2011 at 1:31 pm
If it makes you feel better, these things will be dead in a matter of months. Then they can stop the assault on our mother earth and our health care premiums.
28. Jennifer | September 30th, 2011 at 4:56 am
Just an FYI…. That is not a Hoveround. It is in fact a scooter, but is not manufactured or sold by Hoveround. You should probably figure out what you are talking about before slandering a company, which is creating jobs and helping old & lazy Americans through their time of need–all thanks to federal government subsidies through Medicare!
29. nampa1 | December 2nd, 2012 at 7:06 pm
In the medical community we say “Gomers never die.” These people will rack up hundreds of thousands of dollars per year for years. But heh, if they didnt get the money, it would just go down the hole of an oligarch’s belly, so why not.