A “Westerner’s” severed head was found in a plastic bag hanging from a rope from a bridge in Thailand on Monday. Turns out he wasn’t murdered, he was just depressed. And he wasn’t just any ol’ Westerner: he was a 53-year-old Italian named Maurizio Tosadori. So he tied a rope around his neck and jumped from the Rama VIII bridge, leaving nothing behind but an indecipherable note that one Italian embassy official believed had coded messages indicating a “Russian mob-style execution.” Now why would they go ‘n say that, huh? Isn’t that the pot calling the kettle black: an Italian holding racist views about Russians all being mobsters! Everyone knows that Russians are peaceful, conscientious citizens of GAIA.
Anyway, for your viewing pleasure, here are a couple of photos you can load into your grandmother’s digital photo frame for Mother’s Day.
“Look! Godzilla!” “No, it’s a giant tortellini!” “No, it’s head cheese!”
And now, drum roll please…the close-up:
“Mama mia! I wanna have-a peaceful death-a. Instead-a, they make-a death porn-a joke, cuz I look-a like-a Hellraiser. Now I even-a more depressed-a than when I commit-a suicide-a. The misery and humiliation-a, she never ends-a! Schopenhauer, I a-gonna kill you!!!”
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9 Comments
Add your own1. Tyler Bass | February 26th, 2009 at 3:13 pm
Why is his head sticking to the rope when the sudden stop clearly decapitated him?
2. Paul Yarbles | February 26th, 2009 at 4:03 pm
Ah, a reference to my beloved Schopenhauer. Dolan is that you?
3. yabadabadoo | February 26th, 2009 at 5:29 pm
Muahhahahhah!
4. Oili | February 27th, 2009 at 7:50 am
looks like the singer from midnight oil.
5. Harv | February 27th, 2009 at 8:36 pm
how unpleasant
6. ozzi | March 1st, 2009 at 4:53 am
“looks like the singer from midnight oil.”
He’s the minister of environment in Australia now, so I wish.
7. A-Lex | March 2nd, 2009 at 10:04 am
Right. “Russian style”. Never seen that in Russia. Not even in the mob-happy 1990s.
What would Westerners ever do without their favorite bogeyman, the Russians? How else would they describe away cases when home-bred Western teenagers whack a whole bunch of kids at a kindergarden (Belgium), stab their roomates for sex (Italy), or just play that classic American high-school game — “Shoot your class.”
I bet that’s all Russian style, too.
8. Jack Boot | March 2nd, 2009 at 11:53 am
How peaceful he looks…
9. jason | March 11th, 2009 at 7:35 am
what a twat!!! no way you scuide yourself that way lol???i think he was murdered?
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