(This article was first published last week on Playboy.com)

America is now in a state of bloodlust, following the shocking realization that there are bad people at the top of our economic food chain. We knew there were some bad apples out there, but AIG’s $450 million bonus swindle simply defies everything we assumed about the American character, particularly the character of our best and brightest, our All-Star Success Stories.

It was one thing to bail out their banks and insurance companies—at least our tax dollars weren’t being wired directly to specific people with names and faces, but rather to “institutions,” which makes it a little more palatable. But now, with the AIG scandal, there are real people stuffing their pockets with money looted from us. It suggests that they have no conscience. That they learned nothing. That, in fact, they didn’t give a fuck about our bailout on any emotional grounds, except as it presented a new feeding opportunity. Despite how it works in the movies, we haven’t been brought closer together—we, the common folk taxpayers, and they, the super-wealthy villains we bailed out. And this is what’s so enraging and humiliating: We were denied that cinematic transformation of character that Americans have been brainwashed to expect from our billionaire CEOs with their hardened hearts-of-gold—think Oscar Schindler’s climactic anti-greed speech, or Mister Magoo throwing coins out the window in the cartoon version of A Christmas Carol.

The shock we’re feeling today is like the shock and rage a wife feels after her husband is arrested on 152 counts of child molestation spanning three decades. How could we not know, when it’s been going on every day, every year, right in front of us?
(more…)

I’ve heard from more than a few people who get all hot under the collar when I say that the whole class war against America started under Reagan. This graph pretty much says it all: it was Reagan who saw to it that America defeated China, Russia and all the other repressive regimes… to make us the world’s number one Gulag Nation. Why did he lock up so many Americans, and keep them there? Put it this way: how can you get away with looting the middle-class and working-class wealth without an uprising? How can you keep people down when you arrange it so that the CEOs’ pay goes from 30 times their workers’ salary when Reagan took over, to over 500 times their salaries? Here’s how you make sure they shut up or else:

(Updated below)

Who is this combover shithead poking his head nervously around the corner? Why, it’s none other than Joseph Cassano, who should be high up on everyone’s list for a little game hunting this weekend. Joseph Cassano, the thief who created AIG’s Financial Products division–that’s the division that racked up $500 billion in losses. Yep, that’s half a trillion dollars–enough to provide health care for tens of millions of Americans, all gone–poof! All because of this fuckhead named Joseph Cassano. He’s doing fine though, thanks for asking–he’s got all the health care he needs and then some, thanks to the fact that while he bequeathed to us a half trillion dollar bill, he pocked for himself about $315 million. Plus after he was forced out of AIG last year, he awarded himself a $1 million monthly pension. That’s $1 million per month. Meanwhile, we’ve dropped $170 billion into AIG and that’s just so far, to clean up his mess… and we had to cough up another $450 million the other day to pay big fat bonuses to Cassano’s former colleagues in his Financial Products division.  They must love Joe there!

But as awful as this sounds, at least there’s a silver lining to this story. A silver lining smeared with blood and cum, that is: yes, Joseph Cassano may soon be gagging on a heapin’ helpin’ o’ prison cock. (more…)

Since news broke about the obscene million-dollar bonuses that taxpayers are paying to the very same AIG Financial Products traders who destroyed millions of lives, decent hard-working Americans have expressed their First Amendment rights and flooded AIG Financial’s offices with so many death threats and angry calls, emails and letters that they’re shitting in their pants and hiring security to protect them. But don’t be put off by this “security”: they’re just a bunch of glorified rent-a-cops, you’ll be able to get past them to express yourself if you put your mind to it. But how can you, John Q. Public, show AIG’s multimillionaires exactly how you feel? (more…)

Mega-Statue Of Chicken Plutocrat Lonnie “Bo” Pilgrim

The killing spree in Alabama fits a well-worn pattern of workplace-driven massacres that we’ve seen since the “going postal” phenomenon exploded in the middle of the Reagan revolution.

In spite of the fact that these killings have gone on unabated for over 20 years, most of the country doesn’t want to know why they’re happening — least of all the people in power.

If we study the motive for Michael McLendon’s shooting rampage Tuesday, which left 11 bodies across three towns in southern Alabama, and we look at the bizarre way that the causes of the shooting are being hushed up, you begin to understand why this uniquely-Reaganomics-inspired crime started in the United States, and continues to plague us. (more…)

Whenever I hear about a rampage massacre like the one that just took place in southern Alabama a few hours ago, so far leaving 11 dead and untold wounded (casualty numbers seem to tick up every hour), the first thing I look for is how the company treated the shooter or the workforce as a whole: did they recently fire him in the usual callous manner that companies do it these days, leaving him desperate and devastated? Has the company been following the typical post-Reagan management model in which workers are squeezed with endless downsizings, slashed benefits, and more time at the job for less pay, all in order to fatten the filthy-rich executives’ already-obscene bonuses?

The answer in the case of today’s Alabama shootings already appears to be yes.

(more…)

Headlines today are filled with stories about how a slaughtered goat was found in front of New York Assemblyman Greg Ball’s house, with a sign around its neck claiming it was the work of the MS-13 gang, a vicious Central American gang whose tentacles have spread throughout America. Ball’s political career was made on bashing illegal immigrants and playing up the Hispanic gang threat to his district’s overwhelmingly Republican constituency. But the more you look at this story, the more it looks like Ball staged the stunt, killing the goat then calling the police and media to say he’s under threat in order to boost his political ambitions. (more…)