AssKisser-Gate: Heartland Institute Founder David Padden Grovels For Master Charles Koch

Koch Whores / February 28, 2012

By Mark Ames

Speaking of the Koch-founded Heartland Institute—busted recently for plotting to brain-pollute America’s K-12 students with fake industry climate change-denial “science”—I came across this hilarious groveling quote from Heartland founder David Padden about his all-knowing Master and Dear Leader, Charles Koch:

“I would never attempt to second-guess whatever he’s doing in the interest of making this a free country. He has a strategy that probably we are unaware of. He’s so smart and so successful that I’m just going to await the outcome.”*

That’s right: Don’t even question the god-like wisdom of Our Dear Libertarian Leader Charles Koch: Just submit, and wait for His plan to work its magic.

That quote comes from Brian Doherty’s highly readable book Radicals For Capitalism: A Freewheeling History of the Modern American Libertarian Movement. The fawning is so grotesque that even Doherty, the libertarian movement’s court historian and a longtime recipient of Koch largesse, describes Padden’s groveling with contempt:

Who the fuck talks that way? Eegads!

But fawning and groveling and complimentary reach-arounds are an ingrained part of the libertarian nomenklatura’s sub-culture. As we’ve said here before, the only groveling grotesque enough to compare to this Koch-bootlicking is that scene in Dune when Baron Harkonnen’s doctor, draining his Master’s giant engorged pustules, purrs,

“You are so beautiful, my Baron. Your skin — love to me. Your diseases — lovingly cared for for all eternity!”

I don’t know why all the Left are abandoning Peter Gleick, the respected climate scientist who risked so much to leak to the public some of the foulness that is the Heartland Institute, except that betrayal and cowardice are unfortunately still all too common among today’s American Left—the Establishment Left at least.

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17 Comments

Add your own

1. Commandante Esteban | February 28th, 2012 at 1:32 pm
Great photo!
2. Robbie | February 28th, 2012 at 1:56 pm
LOL get a life dumbass. Climate change is a joke.
Time to go back in the closet with your communist friends.
gOD bless Texas and America
3. vortexgods | February 28th, 2012 at 2:04 pm
Wow! Baron Harkonnen could be Charles Koch’s twin.
Too bad the rest of us get to play the part of that poor, cringing slave with the heart plug.
4. MIHCAEL MOYNIHAN, AUTHOR OF LORDS OF CGHAOS | February 28th, 2012 at 2:48 pm
re: hitchens
holy shit
5. Odikhmantievich | February 28th, 2012 at 3:19 pm
[feel free to delete] You linked a story about Siemens and Greece. Thought this was relevant: http://www.wsws.org/articles/2012/feb2012/chin-f27.shtml. WSWS has done a handful of interesting articles on Siemens .. check it out.
6. Strelnikov | February 28th, 2012 at 3:25 pm
Fuck off Robbie.
Meanwhile, this bit from Dave “buttplug” Padden pretty much lays out why the Koches need to be destroyed; the belief that Charles Koch knows what the fuck he is doing (beyond dragging America into the 3rd world) and that he should be allowed to get away with whatever scheme he is working on.
7. super390 | February 28th, 2012 at 7:27 pm
Wow, Padden has just summarized the Fuhrer Principle:
(Wikipedia)
This principle can be most succinctly understood to mean that “the Führer’s word is above all written law” and that governmental policies, decisions, and offices ought to work toward the realization of this end…
Hermann Graf Keyserling, a German philosopher, was the first to use the term “Führerprinzip”. One of Keyserling’s central claims was that certain ‘gifted individuals’ were “born to rule” on the basis of Social Darwinism…
The supreme leader, Adolf Hitler, answered to God and the German people. Giorgio Agamben has argued that Hitler saw himself as an incarnation of auctoritas, and as the living law or highest law itself, effectively combining in his persona executive power, judicial power and legislative power. After the campaign against the alleged Röhm Putsch, Hitler declared: “in this hour, I was responsible for the fate of the German nation and was therefore the supreme judge of the German people!”
***
In practical terms, it meant Hitler needed to engage in cynical political flip-flops, compromises and coalitions to get the Nazis into the Cabinet, and he couldn’t have highly ideological Party members (which the early ones were) undermining his decisions.
He needed followers who accepted that his tactical maneuvers would not change his fundamental agenda as outlined in “Mein Kampf” – only the rest of the electorate were to be fooled.
8. ElPrez | February 28th, 2012 at 8:10 pm
The funny thing is that he sounds -exactly- like the toadying suckup “Penultimo” in Tropico 4, a character who constantly sucks up to a dictator and tells him how wonderful and perfect he is.
9. MIHCAEL MOYNIHAN, AUTHOR OF LORDS OF CGHAOS | February 28th, 2012 at 8:50 pm
that dog pic gets me mega hot
10. Strelnikov | February 28th, 2012 at 10:21 pm
Hey Michael. How’s it going?
11. Michael | February 29th, 2012 at 5:04 am
aaaand commenter number 2 robbie cooper is here to represent the white supremacist ignoramus club!hooray!Go back to whacking off to a picture of breitbart!
12. Dimitri Ratz | February 29th, 2012 at 9:56 am
This picture also is a good summary of recent movie that came out called “This Means War”. Bad acting, going toward almost like a James Bond movie, but without all the thrill and plot that makes 007 movies watchable. An accurate description would be a take on Sleepless in Seattle is 95% of the movie, but without the cool samurai references, and some fat guy dorito semi sex scene being the highlight of the story. Don’t be the dog in the back trying to hide it’s face, don’t watch This Means War.
13. MIHCAEL MOYNIHAN, AUTHOR OF LORDS OF CGHAOS | February 29th, 2012 at 10:34 am
strelnikov r u going to write more nasty blogs about me
im just pathetic guy in vermont who does journal why so bad to me
btw your dissertation sounds boring as fuck
14. Anarchy Pony | March 1st, 2012 at 6:23 pm
That pic is just awful, I cringe every time I see it. I mean Jesus Fake Messiah Christ. Did that little dog die in there? I don’t know how it could escape, it’s just so far up there.
15. Dimitri Ratz | March 1st, 2012 at 7:57 pm
Misses Clinton should really shave. It’s enough for secretary of defense making election prediction that her party will get reelected, but now sticking her face in that poor German Shepard. Clearly she’s acting unprecedented for her title, but why? Is she just doing it until Homs blows over? That town is really getting cleaned. With a name like “Friends of Syria”, who’s suprised? Maybe she should of called it “Flawfy Bunny”, couldn’t be any worse of a name. Why is there a city called Hama just down the road from Homs? And another militant group, Hamas named after sauce that goes with fawoful?
To really understand why Hilary Randam Clinton is hiding her hairy face one has to go back 2 more years than a decade. It was a time of flowers and bees, and before the world warmed up. The world spoke with one purpose, and the God’s of those nations through there representatives would meet together. Schroeder, Charak, Berlosoni, Blair, Putin, and George. But Blair’s and George’s God wanted to spread their religion of democracy through violence, and force, and Schroeder, Charak, Berlosoni and Putin did not go along. Schroeder got replaced, and Germany was silenced, Charak too was gone in France, and years passed, and in 2008 Putin had to hand over the reign of power too, and finally Bersloni was forced to resign last year removing all those nations, Germany, France, Italy and Russia that apposed violent conversation of other God’s nations.
Now that Putin is returning, and speaking loud that Baba Yoga Clinton should not be allowed to drink Syrian kids blood all she can do is hide her face.
She’s to scared to face him, because of her shame. So she will wait once he is reelected, and only then speak her mouth with the wretched smell of lies that insult the insides of that poor dog.
16. Scrat | March 1st, 2012 at 9:52 pm
That photo goes far to get a point across in a big way and it’s hilarious but it’s just so so wrong. LMAO!!
17. Matt | March 9th, 2012 at 10:43 am
@ Robbie (above) Have you been sucking the oil schlong so long he almost forgot English? Or maybe you’ve been blinded by all the money your corporate masters are throwing at you that you can’t see the keys too well anymore?
What’s that, you don’t have healthcare so you can’t afford a trip to the eye doctor?
I took a trip to your shitty website and only took about 3.4 seconds to spot a glaring second grade grammatical error used in a sentence talking about the Air Force. As an Air Force veteran myself I’m offended you would substitute the possessive “their” with “they’re” used with Air Force in the same sentence. Shame on you keyboard warrior, shame on you.
Why does Texas want to rewrite school books again? Clearly you didn’t get it right the first time.
Also why don’t you allow comments on your shitty site? Is it because you don’t write any of your own material (except, obviously for your error-laden emotionally driven soliloquies) or you’re afraid a liberal with a “mental disorder” might actually tell you something you don’t like?
Like this perhaps?
http://news.yahoo.com/low-iq-conservative-beliefs-linked-prejudice-180403506.html
Straight from your own right leaning Yahoo News.
Maybe you should write more of your own things, like a real journalist, you know like Mark is, rather than exercising your copy and paste fingers all day. And try to find some actual data to back up your asinine claims. Oh I’m sorry, was three syllables too big of a word for you? “Hard to believe” claims.
And yes, gOD bless us, gOD bless us everyone. aMEN.