Issue #22/103, November 9 - 23, 2000   smlogo.gif

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Feature Story
Moscow babylon
Book Review
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Dead Senatorz
This year, Missouri Democrat and airplane crash victim Mel Carnahan made history when he became the first dead man to be elected to the U.S. Senate. But would anyone have noticed if his corpse had arrived in Washington to take his legislative seat? We at the eXile decided to find out, comparing Carnahan to a technically more alive but debatably no more interesting U.S. Senator, Republican Conrad Burns of Montana...
Exile Sport Notes: Lenin’s Picks
Vladimir “Red” Lenin, founder of modern communism, picks the NFL games to be shown this weekend at Metellitsa-Sportland, Moscow’s diehard communist Sports bar alternative
Presidential Marathon: From Dawn Till Dusk
The new book by former president of Russia Boris Yeltsin, reviewed by former head of the Presidential Security Service Alexander Korzhakov
Gore-illa campaign!
Posing as out-of-control Jewish “operatives” working on behalf of the Gore campaign, we called randomly-selected residents of Florida late Wednesday night and threatened them with “action” for having lost the state to rival candidate George Bush.
Suitably Unsubstantial

A little over a month ago, the U.S. Attorney’s office in Boston ended years of suspense by finally filing a civil suit against former Harvard University hotshots Andrei Shleifer and Jonathan Hay. The two eggheads, eXile readers may recall, once headed the now-defunct Harvard Institute for International Development (Shleifer was the head of the whole institute; Hay was the chief of the Moscow office), the organization which in its day had been charged with distributing much of American aid money to Russia. Both were fired from HIID in 1997 after they were allegedly caught investing in Russia through Shleifer’s wife, Nancy Zimmerman, and Hay’s then-girlfriend, Beth Hebert.

The Waiting House

“Hands behind your back. Face to the wall,” the sergeant with the provincial mug ordered, in an irritated voice, as he fumbled with the ring of keys. Finally locating the needed key, he opened a massive door and shoved me inside. The IVS-the internal detention isolator-is one of the early stops on the long trip to the final destination, the zone. I was not alone in the small room, which was permanently lit by a small dim light bulb. Sitting with crossed legs on the creaking plank-beds was a personage who resembled a woodpecker. Strength gone, I collapsed on the wooden rods, on which boxes for games of craps were carved.

About twenty years ago, radical beardedness represented an alternative to the smooth shaven bourgeoisie. In every sense, the symbolism of the beards of Che Guevara and Fidel Castro was accepted by reasonably educated people everywhere. It was easy to assume a beard as an extension of your political persona. Alas, that is not the way it is.
Pre-Pubescent Sex Tips by Mark Ames

Hey kids! It’s me, your hip school counselor Mark Ames! Wow, it looks to me like we’ve really made some important breakthroughs since our first jam session a couple months back, dontcha think? Some of you are new here, some of you I’ve seen before. That’s okay, too. If you just want to just hang out with us and chill, or if you want to contribute to our little bull session, either way’s cool with me.

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