A “Westerner’s” severed head was found in a plastic bag hanging from a rope from a bridge in Thailand on Monday. Turns out he wasn’t murdered, he was just depressed. And he wasn’t just any ol’ Westerner: he was a 53-year-old Italian named Maurizio Tosadori. So he tied a rope around his neck and jumped from the Rama VIII bridge, leaving nothing behind but an indecipherable note that one Italian embassy official believed had coded messages indicating a “Russian mob-style execution.” Now why would they go ‘n say that, huh? Isn’t that the pot calling the kettle black: an Italian holding racist views about Russians all being mobsters! Everyone knows that Russians are peaceful, conscientious citizens of GAIA.
Anyway, for your viewing pleasure, here are a couple of photos you can load into your grandmother’s digital photo frame for Mother’s Day.
“Look! Godzilla!” “No, it’s a giant tortellini!” “No, it’s head cheese!”
And now, drum roll please…the close-up:
“Mama mia! I wanna have-a peaceful death-a. Instead-a, they make-a death porn-a joke, cuz I look-a like-a Hellraiser. Now I even-a more depressed-a than when I commit-a suicide-a. The misery and humiliation-a, she never ends-a! Schopenhauer, I a-gonna kill you!!!”
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