Vanity Fair profiles The eXile: "Gutsy...visceral...serious journalism...abusive, defamatory...poignant...paranoid...and right!"
MSNBC: Mark Ames and Yasha Levine
Broke the Koch Brothers' Takeover of America
Health & Lifestyle / June 23, 2011

Since no one else in the pro-drug camp will say it, allow me: Ron Paul is a drug war asshole. He’s a con artist playing a shell game with our liberties with his slippery proposal that the answer to this savage 40-year war on individual liberty is to transfer the power to destroy lives from one authority (federal) to another equally cruel authority (state). In doing so, Dr. Paul has shifted the moral debate about the drug war from one of barbarism and injustice to his crusty old Confederate gripe about states’ rights versus federal authority.

Here’s the latest whoop-tee-doo:

Lawmakers to introduce bill to legalize marijuana

By Luis Robayo | AFP – Wed, 22 Jun, 2011

A group of US representatives plan to introduce legislation that will legalize marijuana and allow states to legislate its use, pro-marijuana groups said Wednesday.

The legislation would limit the federal government’s role in marijuana enforcement to cross-border or inter-state smuggling, and allow people to legally grow, use or sell marijuana in states where it is legal.

The bill, which is expected to be introduced on Thursday by Republican Representative Ron Paul and Democratic Representative Barney Frank, would be the first ever legislation designed to end the federal ban on marijuana.

This is a moral issue, plain and simple. And there’s nothing moral about providing federal cover for barbarism at the state level. The reason why America forced the South at bayonet-point to dismantle its racist Jim Crow laws is because those Jim Crow laws were immoral, unjust and barbaric, and Washington either had to force the South to dismantle its racist laws, or else be a party to them by providing federal aid and protection to racist states. Until the Civil Rights legislation of the 60s, all of America was an accessory  to that injustice, protecting, aiding and abetting crimes against humanity.

Millions of Americans have been locked up, their lives destroyed, merely for choosing to relieve the pain of existence via something more sublime (opiates, amphetamines) than that shit peasant drug alcohol they feed us. It’s a violation of the Declaration of Independence, the founding document for this country, which enshrines the “pursuit of happiness” as a sacred right of all Americans. This should be simple for libertarians to accept, and simple for them to say, “It’s as evil to oppress non-violent drug-users at the state level as it is at the federal level.” So say it!

Drug decriminalization is an old cause of the Left, who’ve been pushing for legalization long before the Kochs created their “right-wing hippies” and hitched them aboard the marijuana legalization bandwagon in order to Trojan Horse the Kochs’ free-market program. It’s one thing to form an alliance with libertarians when they’re taking what may appear to be a better practical stance on the drug war than their Republican allies (and most Democrats, for that matter). But for fuck’s sake, don’t roll over and scream like Justin Bieber fangirls just because Ron Paul said something that goes about 1/100th of the way towards drug de-criminalization.

Don’t  cede the moral ground on the drug issue to the libertarians, because they’ve sucked the morality out of it by turning it into a States’ Rights issue.

Not unless the libertarians can explain why it’s bad for Washington to lock up a non-violent drug user, but perfectly fine for Alabama or Tennessee or Oklahoma to deprive a pot smoker or meth drinker or smack snorter of their liberty, and shove them into a rape camp prison system, even though they hurt no one at all, least of all themselves.

No one in America, not at the federal, state, county, municipal level, should be legally kidnapped, raped and pressed into slave labor just because they took drugs in the privacy of their own home. Period. And anyone who thinks it makes sense for states to do so, but not Washington, is a raging baboon asshole.

One more thing: This goes out to all of you Weed-Nazis out there. You better not be planning to do what I think you’re going to do once you get your foot another inch or two inside the respectably-legal door: You better not turn around and slam that door on every other drug-user’s face. Because I know that’s what you filthy pot-heads are planning. As all drug users know, Weed-Nazis are the most duplicitous, moralizing blowhards of all drug users. They never shuttup about their idiotic moral categories, ranking marijuana as a “soft drug” as opposed to “bad” “hard” drugs like meth and opiates.

Marijuana is for dumbshits; it makes dumbshits feel creative. In a charitable moment, I’d be okay with giving dumbshits that chance to experience a false sense of purpose on this planet, but the thing is, those of us with more refined drug tastes, with more advanced cognitive powers, know that marijuana is one of GAIA’s most terrifying booby-traps she ever set. THC equals pure terror and paranoia. Which is why I’m all for imposing a federal death penalty on anyone caught using marijuana or referring to it as a “soft drug” in public, or in the privacy of their own homes. That is, unless the Weed-Nazis are on board with an all-or-nothing drug decriminalization program.

Now, one area where Dr. Paul and I can agree on is that heroin should definitely, definitely be de-criminalized. Or so he said at that debate that had all the Confederate hillbillies a-whoopin’ and a-hollerin’.

Yeah, that was pretty cool–I think Dr. Paul, as a “Doctor” who served in Vietnam, knows what the deal is: “Who in this room would run and use heroin if it was decriminalized?” Dr. Paul yammered to the hicks–and if you noticed carefully, you could see Dr. Paul actually putting his hand up as if to say, “Hey, I can name that Doctor in two notes!” and then suddenly Dr. Paul’s eyes got that crazed junkie jones stare to them. He done near stole my heart with that heroin performance. It’s like we all were given a rare glimpse of the younger Dr. Paul, the Dr. Paul circa-1969, when he first learned the virtue of rational self-interest out on the Vietnam battlefield. Triage situation: Dr. Paul is tending to the Immediates…one guy’s guts are wrapped around a nearby tree trunk, his legs a quivering pair of charred stumps…Dr. Paul’s body aches at the sight of this goner; Dr. Paul uncorks a morphine syringe, flicks it, and thinks, “Why waste good clean shit on worm food like this poor bastard? That’d make no rational sense.” So Dr. Paul crouches in the tall grass and pops the morphine into his own shoulder. The warm rush leads Dr. Paul to another rational thought: so he uncorks another morphine syringe, and sticks himself a second time…Next thing you know, those screams and cries for “Medic!” fade into the great big void…

“Doctor Paul, we thought we lost you! What’s the status of your–um, Dr. Paul?”


“Oh jeez. Dr. Paul, you’re drooling on that soldier’s small intestines. Didn’t we already discuss this problem last week?”


Next thing you know, the Hell of Nam fades from Dr. Paul’s consciousness, the government’s attempts to interfere in his buzz replaced by dreams bathed in gold: Golden light, Golden unicorns, Golden brown…Hey, how about a gold standard!

Whoa, where was I? Oh yeah: Until the libertarians and the Weed-Nazis concede that the drug war is a human rights issue about ending the immoral and barbaric practice of forcing drug users into rape-camps everywhere on American soil, rather than another one of their sleazy States Rights campaigns–until I hear that, and until I hear the Weed-Nazis fight for de-criminalization of all drugs, not just filthy marijuana–until then, I want no part in this.

Devolving tyranny to the states–and adding one shitty drug to the “legalized” list while oppressing the rest–  is just drug-fascism by another name.

Would you like to know more? Read “The Gold-Standard Hustle: Does Anyone Here Speak Paul-tard?”

Buy The eXile: Sex, Drugs and Libel in the New Russia co-authored by Mark Ames and Matt Taibbi (Grove Press).


Click the cover & buy the book!


Read more: , , , , , , , , , , , Mark Ames, Health & Lifestyle

Got something to say to us? Then send us a letter.

Want us to stick around? Donate to The eXiled.

Twitter twerps can follow us at


Add your own

  • 1. anon  |  September 9th, 2011 at 9:34 pm

    The drug legalization issue is not really going to be about either individual rights to smoke it or about overwhelming concern for the health problems of people who do. It’s an old econo-political issue. It’s about big money – aren’t drugs the most lucrative “black market” venture in the US? How many billions are involved in just the pot industry? Wherever there’s big money there’s corruption, hypocrisy, and obstruction of justice. It’s the US after all.

  • 2. c1ue  |  September 16th, 2011 at 4:41 pm

    Weed makes regular people stupid, and stupid people zombies.

    It does seem to help schizos calm down.

    It also seems to help smart driven people relax – i.e. Type A temporary antidote.

    I guess it is all whether you want more stupid people in this world.

    I personally don’t.

  • 3. mad props  |  September 17th, 2011 at 1:17 am

    if pcp is legalized that would probably be pretty neat

  • 4. DeeboCools  |  December 6th, 2011 at 5:04 pm

    big ups to #103 Legalize all dissociatives.

  • 5. Blue Dream  |  December 30th, 2011 at 9:53 pm

    What I don’t get is the preemptive hate against marijuana patients. There are only very few cannabis users that hold closeminded opinions about drugs regardless of what they choose to enjoy themselves, and those that do are hypocrites.

    And then there is the mischaracterization “THC equals pure terror and paranoia.” Clearly the words of somebody who tried weed in high school to be “cool” but was too much of a pussy to stop coughing and enjoy the experience. For smoking grass to launch you into a panic attack, the conditions for the attack have to already be in place. In fact cannabis’ effects very quickly build up tolerance and are mild for most users. Yeah…dude, this fucking comment blogbagger right here, as in, me, can take his weed like a MAN.

    I don’t think that any drug is enough of a “threat” to warrant criminalization.

  • 6. Derek  |  January 1st, 2012 at 1:04 am

    This is propaganda. You love big government and will be happy when the Gestapo comes to your door to take you to your cell at your local FEMA Camp. UFO’s are coming! Hold on while I put on my tin foil helmet! Ron Paul 2012 baby!!!

  • 7. Cody  |  January 2nd, 2012 at 4:20 pm

    Wow dude I might honestly be the biggest fucking idiot you’ve never seen. This comment is a sad excuse for baggertarian protest. i’m a clown

  • 8. Scott  |  March 17th, 2012 at 4:36 am

    I have read all the arguments pro and con and can agree with both sides except for one thing….I live in Nevada. Vegas to be exact. As many of you know Nevada allows legalized gambling and prostitution. Both are regulated and taxed by the state very successfully I might add.

    In fact Nevada is and has been a model for state rights for many years and we have had our battles with the federal govt since day one of our statehood.

    What we do is allow the counties to govern morality laws and even cities. Example: In southern Nevada you have a population base of one large city (Vegas) and two smaller cities on each end separated by mountains each about a 20 drive

    On one side is the town of Parhump where gambling and prostitution is legal and you can carry a licensed weapon if so desired.

    On the other side of the Vegas valley is Boulder City. There is no gambling, alcohol of any type is hard to find and prostitution is not legal and gun laws are very strict.

    In the middle is sin city where gambling is legal, alcohol is an accepted way of life in the tourist corridors so long as you don’t drive and prostitution is not legal (technically)

    When drugs become legal in Nevada, each county and city will decide for themselves how they want to do this. They may keep it as is or legalize it. It will not be a uniform statewide issue.

    My guess is that Vegas will legalize pot and tax it with the same laws that govern alcohol except I doubt there will be any public smoking allowed. Heroin will only be administered to addicts in its purest form on the condition that the addict agrees to go to state rehab.

    Lifting the federal prohibition will help eliminate crime associated with the the underground economy that creates turf wars.

    The cost of law enforcement, the judiciary and incarceration due to the prohibition would go way down if not eliminated in time.

    We have learned here in Nevada that legislating morals even at the county level is not easy but it is better that what we and all other major cities are experiencing right now THAT THE FEDERAL DRUG LAWS ARE NOT WORKING.

    Let states decide how to handle this problem.

  • 9. miko  |  May 27th, 2012 at 9:53 pm

    Romney if elected will complete the end of the USA as we once new it. A vote for Romney is a vote for our demise. Romney IS Obama…Dr. Ron Paul 2012. AEC: Haha! He’s just kidding folks! Thanks for the classic bagtard humor, buddy! eXiled readers need a good laugh or two in these serious times. Keep it up!

  • 10. Robert  |  February 17th, 2013 at 6:12 am

    Libertarians have long held the moral high ground on the immorality of drug laws.

    Libertarians favor localism as and if a tool for rights, and don’t advocate states’ rights. States have no rights in their view.

    Paul is not a libertarian but a GOP states rightist. He’s favorable to many Libertarian views and once ran as the USLP candidate–but has many anti-libertarian views as well.

    Thaty said, a great article on what is wrong with the Paulistas.

  • 11. junkie pro 1488 geil gitle  |  January 27th, 2015 at 3:01 pm

    Fuck your morality, pal. Democracy is democracy regardless of your utterly naive views on morality. If a country wants to expel its negroes and use heroin so what? It’s none of your goddamned business. Morality is a myth invented by religious nuts.

Leave a Comment

(Open to all. Comments can and will be censored at whim and without warning.)


Required, hidden

Subscribe to the comments via RSS Feed