Vanity Fair profiles The eXile: "Gutsy...visceral...serious journalism...abusive, defamatory...poignant...paranoid...and right!"
MSNBC: Mark Ames and Yasha Levine
Broke the Koch Brothers' Takeover of America
eXile TV / August 9, 2011
By Mark Ames

Update: You MUST watch today’s Ratigan performance. If we’re not going to riot against all this crap like the rest of the world is doing, Ratigan will riot for us. [Video below]

Exiled Online editor Mark Ames went on MSNBC’s Dylan Ratigan Show Thursday to respond to Russian strongman Vladimir Putin’s latest trash-talking smackdown against America, in which Putin accused the world’s only superpower and leader of the free world of, “sponging off the global economy like a parasite.”

Ames is appalled at the shame of living through America’s bottomless decline: “A Russian autocrat calling America a ‘parasite’–like he’s some John Galtsky, and we Americans are just sponging off Mother Russia?! Which, okay to be fair, technically we are–but still.”

“America has become a punchline in Vladimir Putin’s standup routine–we’re the laughingstock of the world’s laughingstock!”

O, how the once-mighty have fallen, folks!

While our country’s political and media establishment are going about their foul business like they’re still running a Superpower, Ames told Dylan Ratigan’s viewers that it’s time for us to stop pretending that America isn’t going to shit. Instead of pretending like we’re still Number One, it’s time for us to start embracing the shame. And you can start doing that by getting out a paper grocery bag and hiding your face.

Embrace the shame, America!

Just in case you’ve forgotten why you should hide your face in a paper bag and be embarrassed as Hell about America’s decline, Ames reminds viewers why:

“Just a decade ago, Russia was our punching bag for our triumphant leaders and comedians. It was as though Russia only existed then as a hard lesson to the rest of the world in, ‘Do you see what happens when you fuck a free-world superpower in the ass, huh Mother Russia?'”

(Okay that last clause was edited to, “what happens when you mess with the best,” but still, you get the point folks.)

First step is recognizing and embracing the shame. The next step: Fighting back, RAT-FOCR style, as first discussed in Ames’ last appearance on the Dylan Ratigan Show.

Let’s FOC the RATs–we don’t really have a choice anymore, folks. We’ve tried fleeing. We’ve tried being partisan. We’ve tried cynicism, we’ve tried nihilism, we’ve tried romanticizing losing out to the pigfuckers of this world–and maybe that made sense in more prosperous times. But not today.

At some point, losing gets boring, folks–losing has lost its romantic appeal. We can FOC the RATs. And we will.

Sometimes there’s no choice left but to FOC the RATs. Which is why RAT-FOCR is moving forward. We’ll have to be a bit patient about this though: to FOC a RAT it’s got to be done right. It will take time to get it off the ground.

Meanwhile, watch Ames’ rant on Dylan Ratigan‘s show [full transcript published below], and make sure you keep a paper bag handy:

Here is the transcript of Ames’ rant:

Hi, America. You probably don’t know it yet, but right now, you really shouldn’t be showing your face around. You should be way too embarrassed, as in paper-grocery-bag-over-the-head embarrassed. Because as any fan of a losing sports team (cough-Oakland Raiders-cough-cough!) can tell you, when you’ve thrown your lot in with losers, and you’re stuck with them year after year, there’s no point pretending–the only way to deal with the shame is to embrace, and flaunt it, and wear it, paper bag style.

Here’s the problem: While the people running this country are pretending like things have always been this way, America has become a punchline in Vladimir Putin’s standup routine. A few days ago, Putin went before a crowd of Russian teenagers, trashing the United States as a “parasite” on the global economy.

A Russian autocrat calling America a “parasite”–like he’s John Galtsky and we Americans are just sponging off mother Russia? (Which–to be fair–we technically are.)

I don’t know if you remember this or not, but just a decade ago, Russia was our punching bag for our triumphant leaders and comedians. It was as though Russia only existed as a hard lesson to what happens when you mess with the best. It was only yesterday –Yeltsin begging us for handouts, Russians lining up for hours just to eat a Big Mac.

And let’s face it: it felt good. Who can forget George Bush-41 doing a dirty chicken dance at the republican convention about “I beat the Russians in the Cold War!”

Today, Americans line up at McDonalds job fairs to flip burgers for Vlad.

A decade ago, America was called “the most powerful empire the world has ever known.” We were running around the world lecturing Russia and everyone else about how they should run their economy, how they should run their political systems… and we shook our heads sadly at how the poor savages would never, ever get their act together.

And now, look at America a decade later: two losing wars–now three–a collapsed economy that we can’t fix for the life of us because our political system is corrupt and broken.

Today, we’re a punchline in Putin’s jokes, an object of his contempt.

We’re the laughingstock of the world’s laughingstock.

It hurts–it should hurt.

Instead of trying to figure out how this happened or why, I want to know-who? Who did this to us? Who? Who??? I want answers–I also want a brown paper bag, but I want answers, and I want names of the failures who are doing this to us.

Last time I was on this program, I talked about this problem, and I offered a way to fight back–an organization called RAT-FOCR. I want to tell you that I was surprised by the reaction from that show. So I want you to know that with your help, this organization is moving forward. Blaming one side or the other doesn’t work–mere cynicism doesn’t work. We’re failing because failures are in control. I don’t think it’s a hopeless cause–if Russia could turn around, so can we.

If Russia after losing the cold war and everything else, could turn it around, we the nation that beat them to the moon and everything else surely can fix it and it is up to us to fix it ourselves.

Don’t forget to watch the Dylan Ratigan Show weekdays at 4pm EST, 1pm PST. Also check out Ratigan’s website and make sure to downloadRatigan’s excellent podcasts at Radio Free Dylan. For a taste of Ratigan, sample this extraordinary clip:


Visit for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy


Mark Ames is the author of Going Postal: Rage, Murder and Rebellion from Reagan’s Workplaces to Clinton’s Columbine.

Click the cover & buy the book!



Read more: , , , , , , , Mark Ames, eXile TV

Got something to say to us? Then send us a letter.

Want us to stick around? Donate to The eXiled.

Twitter twerps can follow us at


Add your own

  • 1. Michal  |  August 9th, 2011 at 10:00 am

    Considering Russia’s own financial problems in terms of not only debt but also structure of economy entirely dependent on oil exports, its demographic problems in terms of growth but also health, rampant corruption in education as well as judiciary, perhaps Putin should be doing some introspection rather than trying to make a punching bag out of a country that still seems to pretty much dominate the world.

    He sure likes to paste his gloat about world’s “parasite” all over media friendly to him, but it’s pretty hypocritical coming from a man who’s made it a national policy to blackmail neighbours over gas prices.

  • 2. adam  |  August 9th, 2011 at 11:18 am

    Ames, we need some literature to pass out; possibly pamphlets on FOCking the RATs. Can you put something into MS publisher or photoshop, post it on the site for download so we pass it out? Or maybe ask for draft submissions?

    Let’s get this started!

  • 3. Destro  |  August 9th, 2011 at 11:20 am

    I think Michal who posted above doth protest too much….

  • 4. TheLounge  |  August 9th, 2011 at 11:38 am

    Bravo Ames. This was your best bit yet.

    I still am a little surprised that MSNBC openly plugs and lets you get away with saying ratfocr.

  • 5. Kyesh  |  August 9th, 2011 at 12:41 pm

    I disagree with Mark; it kind of does feel good to be a punching bag, because I didn’t do anything wrong. I feel vindicated because I predicted this scenario over a decade ago, when I lived in Russia and saw the Jeffrey Sachs of the world fisting Russia while Letterman told lame jokes about standing in line. This place is finally, mercifully collapsing and I’ve made my plans abroad. The rest of you yanks can either make peace with your new humiliating, and permanent, status or just start drinking like the Russians did.

  • 6. Prius  |  August 9th, 2011 at 12:48 pm

    Dear Michal:

    I’m afraid that RAT-FOCR cannot accept comments that in any way impede the business of FOCing the RATs. Good day.

  • 7. Damn!  |  August 9th, 2011 at 12:50 pm

    This is like two druggies fighting:
    Druggie 1. “At least i don’t do amphetamine!”
    Druggie 2. “What kind of lowlife is he? Crack!”

    Problem? Both are druggies and worth more or less nothing!

  • 8. Trevor  |  August 9th, 2011 at 12:59 pm

    The hardest part is getting Americans to actually recognize that feeling of shame. If this culture had a stronger shame-sense, we wouldn’t allow Texas to exist.

  • 9. John Drinkwater  |  August 9th, 2011 at 1:08 pm

    Why don’t they just move The Dylan Ratigan Show over to Russia Today and be done with it? MSNBC is fucking deader than fucking dead. Scarboro, Larry O’Donnel, Maddow – makes me fucking sick to watch those corporate party hacks. Plus, Ames should be a superstar at RT.

  • 10. ritta  |  August 9th, 2011 at 3:59 pm

    As long as Russian women sell themselves cheaply to old American geezers, we’re on top. Watch out when the opposite happens.

  • 11. Sick and Wrong  |  August 9th, 2011 at 5:43 pm

    This speech sounded political. Wasn’t the usual Mark Ames.

    Sounded too patriotic, as well. That’s when you know people are making politically motivational speeches, when they say all sorts of patriotic bullshit that makes Americans feel better about themselves.

    “We beat those Russians to the Moon… and to everything!”. Yeah, like to space? Or to free health care, or low Gini coefficient, or free education?

    I know we don’t have anything of that now, but you’ve beat USSR to nothing, we had it all. And to even presume that you won the Cold War…? What, how?? What did you ever contribute to winning it?

    You realize the USSR imploded, not got exploded by your democracy bombs? Our progress was so fast, our humanity couldn’t catch up with it, creating a corrupt political elite, who destroyed the country from within. But it had little to do with you, USA.

    But what am I talking about, you knew all that, Mark Ames. Yet I’m too much of a fucking retard to grasp what’s going on. So therefore, I’ll whinge on your website.

  • 12. Zhu Bajie  |  August 9th, 2011 at 6:39 pm

    Chinese universities are recruiting English teachers about now. . Feed your Russophilia in Harbin!

  • 13. Ilona  |  August 9th, 2011 at 6:44 pm

    Just wait who’ll deliver the most solid punchline after China starts to invest in its growing domestic markets in large scale and needs the funds invested in loans to the USA back for its own use.

    Possibly then the USA’ll be truly fucked as well as already shaky European economy. And Russia? Even nastier autocracy i.e. good old totalitarianism? And once again a new glorious Gogol or Bulgakov shall see a day of light?

    Have your democracy for sale. Fuck you! Pay! Have your free world for über rich. Fuck you! Pay! Have your useless global domination wars. Fuck you! Pay!

  • 14. Ed  |  August 9th, 2011 at 7:01 pm

    Putin is a bad-ass. If I were Russian, I’d vote for him. And the U.S. is a piggish/parasite nation. As the U.S. descends, Russia rises. Russia has lots of natural resources and is the only nation with a manned launch vehicle that routinely goes into space.

    What does the U.S. have? Mostly paper, apparently. They’re trying to trade paper for hard goods. The Euro is in danger of being trashed. I wonder what the future holds for the dollar.

    Now … someone explain to me why crude oil prices went down in the last couple of days. Maybe those sheiks are playing ball.

  • 15. 447ght  |  August 9th, 2011 at 7:26 pm

    Really, Mark, how dare you try to found a grassroots movement for tax reform! Where are your billionaire backers? Where is your PR Machine? Where is your slavering horde of ideological toadies? Where is your economist and politician-vetted report on the benefits of such a change? Where is your trust fund backed university think-tank? It seems you have at least one TV pundit on your side and I’ll be first to admit RATrFOCRs has heart, but doesn’t seem like grassroots to me!

  • 16. Sick and Wrong  |  August 9th, 2011 at 10:24 pm

    Who wouldn’t try to improve my original message? Is there some kind of angel-moderator, or was it Master Ames?

    Well, if you want an ignorant cunt, you can use me. It’s anonymous.

  • 17. One-eyed Jesus muffin  |  August 10th, 2011 at 12:13 am

    We’d dominate the Ass-Holympics.

    We’re Americans.

    Born to win.

  • 18. Taryn H.  |  August 10th, 2011 at 3:09 am

    Dylan’s rant needs to be our Santelli moment (except real). We need to follow this up and organize something. We shouldn’t let it slip away and we definitely shouldn’t wait on Obama (he’s going to get a billion dollars from these people for his campaign).

  • 19. Edmund Dorkey  |  August 10th, 2011 at 7:28 am

    In the land of Actually Existing Democracy, actually using one’s “freedoms” is a crime:

  • 20. Post it: Her Majesty's Gopniks  |  August 10th, 2011 at 11:53 am

    You guys really gotta republish “Her Majesty’s Gopniks,” this being Yob Week and all.

  • 21. Outcry for JUSTICE  |  August 10th, 2011 at 12:30 pm

    Her Majesty’s rule should be recognized as illegitimate, a no-fly zone should be declared. Libya should bomb the oppressive government and support the rebels.

    Queen’s foreign accounts should be frozen, then handed over to the rebels. Her palace must be bombed, and a stray bomb should kill Prick Charles “accidentally”.

    Mark Ames should be appointed head of the state and legalize prostitution, weed and fighting arenas!

  • 22. Alan  |  August 10th, 2011 at 3:43 pm

    My thinking is that Russia has moved from communism to fascism in a few easy decades. Their perestroika democracy was as phony as ours. There are more billionaires in Moscow than any other city in the world. The great raped masses don’t know exactly what’s happening to them, but it appears the governments of the developed nations are being bought (including America)by the international corporatists. It makes the old conspiracy theories look pale by comparison.

    Christian fundamentalists generally believe that their “Antichrist” will arise out of Russia (supposedly, Russia is “Gog and Magog”). After 9-11, many began teaching the “Beast” would come from Islam (which accounts for the fascist paranoia against Muslims).

    If Germany was ripe for Hitler after austerity and their depression, where are we headed now? As America goes, they say, so goes the world. America is staring into the abyss as the great, global heist continues.

    It’s a new day, but the same old shit, just on an even larger scale as the new aristocratic landowners jockey for their positions among the global elite while robbing us first and then the rest of the peoples of the earth in succession. And what then will they do with the loot?

    Can a real global democratic revolution be ahead of us, starting in Egypt and engulfing the world? The oligarchs don’t want to wait and find out. They are trying to figure out how to protect themselves from the angry hordes (a privatized military-police). No matter how you cut it, as Leonard Cohen once sang, “We’ve seen the future, and it is murder.”

  • 23. Vladimir  |  August 11th, 2011 at 1:36 am

    The article says, “We’ve tried cynicism, we’ve tried nihilism…–and maybe that made sense in more prosperous times.”

    Unless you and everyone understand that this makes no sense whatever the times, things do not promise prosperity.

  • 24. Sick and Wrong  |  August 11th, 2011 at 4:26 am

    Alan, you’ve swallowed too much of their propaganda to see things clearly.

    If you see the world as the opposition of democracy vs. totalitarianism, you’re not going to understand anything.

    The real goal is not democracy, it’s progress and humanity, some call it modernism. The democracy is a mean, not the end goal. But it’s not the only mean, there are many examples of countries modernized through tyranny, like Bonapartist France.

    This “modernism” brings, along with good things, things like the rule of the weak, rights to all kinds of minorities, perversity, prostitution, narcotics, broken democracy. So, of course, when the Muslim world sees that, they’re shocked that you want to bring it to them. They don’t want this shit. And through their democracy or tyranny, they’ll reject this offer and they’ll go into counter-modernism, becoming stuck in the middle age culture. And Obama’s counting on it.

    The revolution he organized in Egypt brought about the rule of Muslim Brotherhood, which are fundamentalists and ex terrorists. So he’s planting democracy as a mean to counter-modernism in Arab countries. Except it failed in Libya and Syria, but we haven’t seen the end of it for Syria yet.

    Anyway, that being said, I want to address another issue…

    Russian government is fascist??? Let’s get this shit straightened out. Russia’s got 80 ethnicities living on its territory and the government subsidies go to the Caucasus region (full of hairy Chechen monkeys) more than anywhere else. If that’s discrimination, it’s at least a positive one.
    Russia’s general mood may be between centrist and nationalist right now, but it’s still far from fundamentalist or fascist. Our current “president” is a liberal for fuck’s sake. The Media is forbidden to say ethnicities of criminals, anything out of the ordinary is labeled as “extremism”. Any terrorist act is always attributed to “russian skinheads”, not the other way around. Does that sound like fascism a lot? Tool.

  • 25. SlavicPride  |  August 12th, 2011 at 8:06 am

    Sick and Wrong is totally right, totalitarianism is so misunderstood, its unique economic advantages are unrivaled.

    Russia’s most successful export is not gas, its their women, – cheap, affordable sukas available for a price of a Diet Coke in all of the third world, keeping Russian economy afloat through any recession. By now every Rajiv and Ahmad has had a ride, but the sukas just keep giving.

    So fear not, America, once you drop your silly notions of liberty and dignity, you’re gonna be recession-proof like Mother Russia.

  • 26. al  |  August 12th, 2011 at 1:05 pm

    so what i cant understand is–well, actually, being retarded, i can’t understand much of anything, period–not even how to capitalize the first person singular. but i do understand one thing: Ames he’s a man …

  • 27. al  |  August 12th, 2011 at 1:30 pm

    I cant take it – from the completely improved post above, must have been something that he found retarded. this “earnest” comment-troll thanks The eXile for correcting grammatical and ideological errors – to the extent that a hillbilly sockpuppet such as myself has a single idea in his head. heres what I said again – Ames is a man, his past work shows that he, America, and women matter…awaiting “moderation”

  • 28. al  |  August 12th, 2011 at 1:41 pm

    Ames hates home-schooled American commenters too retarded to post a grammatically sensible comment. and since i’m one of the home-schooled hillbillies something tells me that if i run around saying ames hates women that like i’ll totally change everything and stop the liberal commie evil that he is unleashing on America.


  • 29. al  |  August 12th, 2011 at 1:44 pm

    freedom of press ? what a twat i must be to think that “freedom of the press” means “freedom to post anonymous retarded ungrammatical comments from any chav with a keyboard”
    hey, for a retard you gotta admit i know my constitutional law pretty well!

  • 30. al  |  August 12th, 2011 at 1:59 pm

    Hey, why do you think Jim Goad keeps cyberstalking this site? Doesn’t he have a job? sad to see him turn into exactly the sort of envious parasite that ayn rand wrote about in “atlas shrugged”

  • 31. al  |  August 12th, 2011 at 2:18 pm

    Maybe I am Jim Goad, or maybe I am Gavin McGinnes with my hand up the Jim Goad sockpuppet. Who knows? Either way, I’m an obsessively envious parasite. Oh and you’re a traitor! And a bad person! I should know, because I broke a woman’s skull and bit her thumb and went to jail for it, so I’m kind of like an authority on the matter! Me and Gavin both, he’s pretty awesome because he’s a white supremacist according to the new york times and has written all sorts of private and public things that are antisemitic. can’t wait for his book to come out, about how he fought racist skinheads in his youth!

  • 32. al  |  August 12th, 2011 at 2:26 pm

    Anyway so check out this awesome new smear strategy I have: Mark Ames is a traitor to America! How awesome is this? I mean it worked awesomely for McCarthy and since I’m punk rock and all, and you know, Ames is a Jew, and you know how Jim Goad feels about Hebrews and all–so yeah, I think calling Ames the Jew a “traitor” to America is a real winner. Just you wait. There’s a fifty-part series in Breitbart all about it!

  • 33. al  |  August 12th, 2011 at 2:27 pm

    Basically Gavin McGinnes is a fucking Canadian

  • 34. al  |  August 12th, 2011 at 4:36 pm




  • 35. Pavel  |  August 15th, 2011 at 4:21 am


    The comments are lulzy!

    The yanks cannot take such a sucker punch from Vlad the Impaler. C’mon now, its bollocks, stop reacting so butthurt! Politicians talk shit all the time, stop even caring for what they say. Remember that cunt Hillary Clinton who claimed Putin has no soul..later shaking hands with Bad Vlad when she became the Secretary of State, smiling politely))

  • 36. Artyom  |  August 15th, 2011 at 9:24 am

    Funny see this discussion falling to “who’s cooler – US or Russia”?
    For sure, US is living A WAY richer life now – I just had a chance to compare this January))) But Ames’ point – if I’m gettin’ it right – is that US is loosing the pace – and doing it pretty fast. And that’s a fact. Just compare Russia’s and US national debts – either per capita, or total, or per GDP or whatever. Find any information on incomes dynamics in Russia and compare it to US; cheap women? ahha, we still have’em here, in stock, please come get some for we don’t need them. Russia imports only the best – like Naomi Campbell. (BTW, actually most of chip girls American old fatties are getting are actually from Ukraine – but who cares.)

  • 37. José Cruz  |  August 28th, 2011 at 7:55 pm

    Russians lived quite a while without church, which explains the unapologetical, actually pridish and for a good reason, drinking and sexing. And also why “horny” russian women linger in repressed grenchos minds. Racists won´t do a dark woman or man, now how senselessly prudish is that? A couple generations later and you have half a country with defective cromosomes, pretending to earn cash if lucky just to hand it back willingly to your masters at month´s end. On top and all. Kudos.

  • 38. Greg  |  March 19th, 2014 at 8:15 am

    Thank god this site still uses the services of the AEC to improve my trolling. And it’s free too! Just want to say that I wish I had Ames’ brains and balls. I don’t; but I do have an improved comment.

Leave a Comment

(Open to all. Comments can and will be censored at whim and without warning.)


Required, hidden

Subscribe to the comments via RSS Feed