Issue #04/59, February 25 - March 10, 1999  

I suppose malaria sorta rhymes with Bulgaria, but it's hardly the kind of thing you want to put in the title of a restaurant review--unless you're trashing the place, that is. But I come to praise Mehana Bansko, not to bury it. Let's call it MB for short--it's the place at Smolenskaya (on the little side street around the corner from the new Stockmann) with the intricate wood-carved entryway you might have noticed in the past couple months. Aside from Bulgarian specialties, they also have some Macedonian items--not that I'd know the difference. Since you probably don't either, I'm probably safe bullshitting a bit. So here goes!

Probably the easiest way to describe Bulgarian (and/or Macedonian) cuisine is that it's like Greek with twice the feta cheese and a satisfying pair of hearty testicles where the north-central Mediterranean blandness would usually be. Which is a good thing, even if it doesn't sound like it. It's also a fairly rustic, homey eating experience, with reasonable prices to match.

We started with some veal tongue and sinus-opening horseradish (75R), along with the so-called shopska salad (70R)--a bounteous serving of cucumbers, tomatoes, peppers, and feta, topped with a fine oil/vinegar dressing of the diner's own blending. The fried chicken strips in beer batter (65R) makes for a pretty nifty hot appetizer, as long as the excessive oil doesn't bother you, which it didn't us. For a slightly less artery-clogging heated option, try the fried eggplants in tomato sauce (100R)--spicy yet subtle, and every bit the crowd-pleaser. If soups are your thing, you can do a lot worse than the bob chorba, a hearty bean soup and a steal at just 40R (although the "bacon lardoons" that come floating in it might be a bit much if you've already put away a portion of the fried chicken strips).

The entrees range far and wide, from the simplicity of grilled kebabs (at 130-165R, the most expensive food items on the menu) to the bucolic-entraily richness of sudzhuk po-banski (homemade pork sausage) for a mere 80R. The lasagna-ish musaka (95R), with its baked layers of eggplant, tomato, and rice, should be familiar to many, while the potato puree is one of the pleasingest 20R garnishes you're likely to find this side of the Carpathians.

We were rather stuffed by this point or else we certainly would have tested out the showcase dessert of fresh fruits in cognac (50R). As a consolation item, we sampled the pancakes with chocolate and walnuts (20R), a Nutella-ish concoction to be sure, but nevertheless terrific. The wonderful pancakes are also available with either jam or honey for the same low price. The coffee fell short of perfection, but was still far superior to the lowly mean to which most Moscow coffee seems to aspire.

Drinks are cheap all around, with authenticated Bulgarian wine available at 275R per bottle for those seeking to make their Balkan eating experiences complete. The multitude of decorations adorning the restaurant interior perhaps takes the whole rural-old-Slavic quaintness thing a bit too far for its own good, but it's hard to complain too seriously considering the wallet-friendly prices. Besides, the absurdly costumed waiters possess genuine skill and exude helpfulness; they even seem to have mastered the fine art of not staring directly at you as you eat when they have nothing better to do during a slow late-lunch shift.

Whether Mehana Bansko is an genuinely Bulgarian establishment I am in no position to say, but a satisfyingly tasty Balkanized deal of a meal it most certainly is.