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(Articles sorted by the date they were added to The eXiled archives, not their original publish dates.)

Letter From America: I, Mark Ames, Goes Lesbian Yenta

In the Reagan years alternative culture trends came and went with such speed that only a desperate fool tried to keep up. I was a desperate fool, and I tried at times to keep up, but I was too slow…

Posted on: August 23rd, 2001 | Comments (2)

Book Review: Trainspotting With Guns...

Made in Yugoslavia By Vladimir Jokanovic Translated by Zeljana Zovko and Cathy Porter Picador, 2001 Ah, we’re already nostalgic for the little wars of the nineties, especially the colorful Balkan popups, with their quaint rituals and goofy flags. Remember those…

Posted on: November 4th, 2001 | Comments (1)

War Nerd: Make America Roman

Last column I asked readers to suggest wars that’d be more fun for the US to get involved in than Colombia. I got some great answers — and thanks everybody who wrote in — but when I looked into the…

Posted on: September 6th, 2002 | Comments (6)

Today We’ll Introduce You To The Intestinal Roundworm

Our friend,the Roundworm Today we’ll introduce you to the Intestinal Roundworm, a hideous parasite which infects one out of every four people in the world. That’s not a misprint: one out of four. More than one and a half BILLION…

Posted on: May 20th, 2003 | Comments (3)

The Hydatid Cyst - Man’s Worst Friend

Cyst (left) in child’s brain. Everybody knows a few of the more overhyped parasites who infest this great rotting corpse we call Earth, but most people don’t realize how many of them there are, and how resourceful they are in finding…

Posted on: May 3rd, 2003 | Comments (4)

Strokes: Pop! Goes Your Brain

“Aging is a process which we know will go from bad to worse, until it comes to the worst of all.” — Arthur Schopenhauer In Schopenhauer’s world, you’re not allowed to die quickly, the way people die in movies. You’re…

Posted on: April 17th, 2003 | Leave Comment

Feature: New York Times Hack Eats Horse Sperm Pie

His name was Pobornik. He had never read The New York Times. He would never be able to recognize a classic “pyramid lead.” His hours were occupied by other pursuits: grazing, sleeping standing up for long stretches, swatting away insects with…

Posted on: April 5th, 2001 | Comments (9)