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The Daily Inquisition / December 12, 2008

Today’s Defendant: Pro-drug Journalists

Statement of the Grand Inquisitor: You know who we’re talking about. You’ve read them before. They are the boring progressives who cover the War on Drugs. It’s not just a fancy name. It’s a real war with guns, death and imprisonment. With innocent victims and evil assholes, a slow-burning fight with The Man. And it’s being fought not in Afghanistan, Iraq or even Mexico, but everywhere around. But how do these journalists report on it? Like it’s their freshmen Chemistry paper on hydrogen bonds. They bore you do death. They fill up newsprint with thoughtful progressive dribble, citing statistics, interviewing respectable white-coats, talking to dull drug rights activists and discussing economics of cost-benefit analysis. They don’t take sides, and never do they admit why they decided to cover this beat in the first place. Fact is, they’re too chickenshit to tell the truth: They write about drugs because they like drugs and use drugs. Because they themselves are drug users, and the criminalization of drugs affects them, first and foremost. Sure, there are those who try to admit it in a mousy sort of way. But they come off looking even more cowardly and awkward than the ones who choose to hide it.

Here’s one from a brave reporter writing for Wired about legalizing already legal medical brain enhancers:

“These laws,” write the Nature authors, “should be adjusted to avoid making felons out of those who seek to use safe cognitive enhancements.”

After all, according to the law’s letter, seven percent of college students and 20 percent of scientists should have done jail time — this journalist, too.

You can hear his mind working all the angles: “Ok. So seven percent of college students and 20 percent of scientists illegally use prescription meds to get high? That’s backed up by cold-hard facts. Ok. So I guess it won’t hurt to put myself in their camp, it’ll even make me seem edgier. But let me keep it as a vague punchline, just in case. Wouldn’t want this information affecting my future.”

It’s really painful to read, like watching a flaming 40-year-old single man with a vacation property in Miami Beach pretend he’s there for the sun and surf, despite a thick lisp and his cheese wrists. Have some balls. Just come out and say it: I like anal action. There’s no shame. You’re living in Miami Beach with your purse dog, for Christ’s sake. Everyone knows you’re gay.

Drugs users — and especially the journalists — need to come out of the closet. Gays didn’t agitate for acceptance by arguing about equal rights in the abstract or by citing gay statistics. They did it by flaming themselves up and sticking their gayness in people’s faces. First it caused anger, then bewilderment and, when it was clear the gays weren’t going anywhere anytime soon, resignation followed by a begrudging acceptance. America’s Jesus-loving masses might not have embraced the gay community yet. But they’ll come around. The gays won’t stop fighting until they get their way, and that’s something we can respect. Not so with the pro-druggers. When it comes right down to it, they are the real fags.

Verdict: Agreed.

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14 Comments

Add your own

  • 1. Jeff  |  December 12th, 2008 at 12:25 pm

    Bring back the “Error has no rights” picture. It was badass.

  • 2. Jon S.  |  December 12th, 2008 at 4:24 pm

    Here we have an unsigned editorial that supports drug abuse in a roundabout way. This begs the question: When are the Exiled’s drug users coming out of the closet? (And if you already have, I stand humbly corrected.)

  • 3. Joseph  |  December 12th, 2008 at 5:21 pm

    Jessica — if the eXile is your home page than there’s no doubt an article about drugs would capture your immediate attention. Call me sometime, or at least email me.

    And to the above poster; the eXile’s principle authors (eg Dolan, Ames) have come out as avid drug users both online and in print.

  • 4. Rick  |  December 12th, 2008 at 9:30 pm

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lEMOYAmzVek

    Artie Lange is the public sphere as a hardcore heroin addict.

  • 5. Foster  |  December 12th, 2008 at 11:15 pm

    The big fear about coming out as a drug user isn’t public shame silly-willys, it’s the fear of not being able to score without getting busted once you do.

    (Also, I want to give a special shout-out to my lovely lady, Dexedrine for getting me through the tough times.)

  • 6. John Smith  |  December 13th, 2008 at 4:28 am

    Most of the civilized world uses drugs when you take things like tobacco and alcohol into account.

  • 7. Izzi  |  December 13th, 2008 at 7:32 am

    There is one reason the elites will never legalize drugs and this reason is the one dividing it sharply from the homosexuality. Homosexuality is good for the economy as it promotes consumption (gays are the ultimate promoters of style, fashion and everything else fancy and expensive) and hard work (they can concentrate on their careers far better than workers with family and kids). Drug addicts are bad for the economy because drugs eliminate all the stimulus for running on the economic treadmill out of the addict’s life

  • 8. Anonymous  |  December 13th, 2008 at 11:10 am

    izzi: That’s hippy bullshit. No-one chases money faster than a smackhead looking for a fix.

  • 9. John Smith  |  December 14th, 2008 at 2:15 pm

    “From Russia With Lust” discusses Matt Taibbi’s heroin use and his and Mark Ames’ speed use. John Dolan said in “Literary Frauds Strike Again …and Again” that he used drugs many times and loved them, although not which ones. Yasha Levine referred to meth as “my personal favorite” in “Why Drug Addiction Isn’t That Bad”, and although I guess that might merely mean “favorite to read about even though I haven’t tried it,” it seems unlikely. I can’t find anything on record about Kevin McElwee, Alexander Zaitchik, and Jake Rudnitsky, but I still need to read the book, “The Exile: Sex, Drugs, and Libel in the New Russia,” which might explain more.

    However, just this once, I’d like to see the Exile editors appending some little signed notes to this Daily Inquisition, along the lines of “I used heroin and loved it, sincerely, Matt Taibbi” “I use speed and love it, sincerely, Mark Ames” and so forth.

    Personally, I use marijuana, shrooms, and acid and love them, and intend to try X and maybe even a little bit of coke someday, but then, I’m just an anonymous commenter.

  • 10. David  |  December 16th, 2008 at 10:32 am

    Matt Taibbi also talked about being on drugs in both of his two books, including an account of interviewing a former drug czar while using LSD.

  • 11. Anthony  |  January 11th, 2009 at 10:53 am

    Everyone uses drugs. Some just have the balls to call them ‘drugs’. Refined sugar. Television. Nicotine. I prefer safer drugs, such as meth and smack.

  • 12. Marshall  |  January 11th, 2009 at 3:46 pm

    When the gay assimilation movement started (don’t know a better term for it), it seemed likely that cannabis would soon be legalized, and being openly gay was very dangerous. At the time, it seemed to me that the in your face approach was counterproductive, but it has clearly gotten results.

    I wish that someone would ask Dr. Gupta during his confirmation process how many people are in jail in the USA for simple possession of cannabis at any time (the estimates I have seen are all over the map, but it is in the many hundreds of thousands), what the excess mortality rate is for being in jail (maybe 200 per 100,000 per year from an article in the NEJM), and whether he would like to have the 1000 or so deaths per year this implies, from imprisonment for simple possession, on his conscious.

  • 13. Mycos  |  January 27th, 2009 at 1:31 pm

    @ Izzi
    I wish someone had told Ernest Shackleford that there was no point in demanding that he not leave on any of his numerous polar expeditions before the cases of Forced March[tm] energy tonic/appetite suppresant had been tightly packed onto his dog sleds.

    The “lazy druggie” is a stereotype for drug users the same as the “drunken alcoholic” is for anyone who drinks. Largely untrue and damaging to all.

  • 14. Just say no to drugs  |  October 24th, 2011 at 7:43 pm

    Yes drug users need to come out of the closet so we can see just how bad the drug epidemic is. People need to know just how bad drugs CAN be to SOME people and it’s not worth the risk to see if you are one of those who can “handle” drug use or not.


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