Nikolai Usatykh, serving 22 years in Arkhangelsk (or is he just 22 years old?)
Twitter may be all the rage here in the United States, but social networking over the World Wide Web has just jumped over a 15-ft. fence and, barely missing a few coils of barbed wire, landed in the middle of Russia’s brutal penal system. These scary-looking, chronically underfed, TB-infected criminals may be serving twenty to life, but that doesn’t mean they can’t have one. With the democratizing power of Internet technology, even the most downtrodden have a voice!
Now, you don’t want to know how they snuck these photos out of their cells or what they did to smuggle the cameras in. Main thing is that once you get an account at Odnoklassniki.ru, you’ll be able to “friend” your favorite zek and start a friendship that will last a decade, at least. Some are somber and introspective, others pretty and simple-minded, while a few, like Dima Khrulyov below, are born with a natural gift with words and philosophy. But don’t expect quick replies to your private messages; it might be a few months or a year or more before you hear back from your new buddy. Sure, they don’t call them Gulags anymore, but visitation hour is still a 72-hour train ride away.
The reigning czarina of Russian sluts, the ever-ambitious Karina Barbie, released a poorly-edited video of herself practicing her poledancing moves when she was 17. Note that she’s poledancing in her parents’ home, with her babushka walking back and forth sans underwear (like babushka, like Karina). That’s right, mom and grandma bought their little baby Karina a pole and set it up in the middle of their provincial apartment living room so that their daughter could practice sliding around on it. Ah, the Third Rome, where would we be without it… (more…)
From the moment Georgia launched its invasion against the breakaway region of South Ossetia this past August, sparking a wider war with neighboring Russia, the New York Times’s news coverage depicted Georgia as an innocent victim of Russia’s neo-imperialist evil. In doing so, the Times engaged in the sort of media malpractice that it promised its readers wouldn’t happen again after its disastrous coverage of the lead-up to the Iraq War. (more…)
Today’s question comes from a reader named Artiom. Send in your own questions, concerns and worries to ask@exiledonline.com. Team eXiled is here to help.
******
Dear eXiled,
I need to sneak out of Russia and travel to Belgium without getting caught. I am a citizen of both countries, but Russia wouldn’t let me out, they want me to serve in the army first.
So how the hell do I get out of here??
This is part two of our ongoing Russian Calendar Girl series, in which we showcase hot Russian office workers featured in their companies’ souvenir calendars.
Russian companies know that sex sells. They also have a ridiculous amount of hot chicks working in them. Putting tyolka and tyolka together, they had a light bulb marketing moment: “Let us not imprison our talent in offices and simply waste it on paper pushing (and the occasional extra-marital blow job). Let us be proud and show them off to the world.” The girls couldn’t be more pleased. In fact, everyone was pleased. And that’s the story of how every Russian company got to have their own “Girls of [Insert Company Name Here]” calendar series. (more…)
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We all know in the backs of our minds that Barack Obama’s incredible victory will eventually be followed by disappointment. But does it have to come so soon, and hit so hard? The answer will be yes, if Lawrence Summers is named treasury secretary in the president-elect’s cabinet, as many observers believe will be the case. Summers was one of the key architects of our financial crisis–hiring him to fix the economy makes as much sense as appointing Paul Wolfowitz to oversee the Iraq withdrawal. And when you look at the trail of economic destruction Summers left behind in other crisis-stricken countries who sought his advice in the past, then “terror” might be a more appropriate word than “disappointment.” (more…)
