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All Articles: Page 19
The A-Team: How Dumb Exactly?

It’s pretty simple, really. If you don’t like action films, don’t go see The A-Team. That is, if you complain when a film has explosions, and a lot of shooting and punching and special effects crashes and whatnot, and no…

Jun 14, 2010 | Comments (26)

Teagagged! Born In Offshore Drilling, Tea Party Protest Silenced Over Organizers’ Links To 2008 “Drill Here! Drill Now!” Campaign

This article was first published in Alternet. Why are the hoppin’-mad Teabaggers so oddly quiet these days, ever since the BP oil disaster? That’s what Thomas Frank, author of What’s The Matter With Kansas? asked last week in his column, “Laissez-faire…

Jun 13, 2010 | Comments (30)

BREAKING NEWS: Mexican Army Captures Zetas Commander In Charge of Monterrey

This afternoon the bullets were once again flying over my city, as Mexican Army soldiers captured the JEFE DE PLAZA of the Zetas in Monterrey Héctor Luna “El Tori” (short for Hector), along with other collaborators in an operation in…

Jun 9, 2010 | Comments (33)

Get Him to the Greek, Then Just Say No

We’re desperate for a laugh these days. Life was bad enough already without oil-covered seabirds. So naturally some gits arranged to provide us with oil-covered seabirds, really glopping the oil on them so they’re clearly immobile in the photos except…

Jun 6, 2010 | Comments (12)

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Victorville Dispatch: Still Here, Still Proud [and Still Poor]

For months people had been asking me if I’m still living in Victorville and if so, why I stopped writing about it. Some dumbshit even accused me of running back to live the big city life, as if I was…

Jun 5, 2010 | Comments (33)

Meet The New York Times Critic Who Took 25 Years To “Get” The Fall

This article first appeared in Viceland.com Somehow I missed this review in the NY Times of The Fall’s new album. The article is titled “Mr. Smith Shows His Staying Power,” and it came out a couple of weeks ago. I wish I…

Jun 4, 2010 | Comments (26)

Escape From America: The Strange & Scary Billionaires Behind The Libertarian-Inspired Sea Castles

This article was first published in Alternet What happens when Americans plunder America and leave it broken, destitute and seething mad? Where do these fabulously wealthy Americans go with their loot, if America isn’t a safe, secure, or even desirable…

Jun 2, 2010 | Comments (108)

Feckin’ Independent Film

Feck, as the Irish say. Feckin’ independent film, it’s not worth shite. I just watched Ondine, this Neil Jordon thing set in contemporary Ireland about a soulful fisherman played by Colin Farrell, who catches a young woman in his fishing…

May 31, 2010 | Comments (17)

A Memorial Day War Nerd: Gettysburg Was The Finest Fight Ever In The World

When the fourth of July rolls around, you’re supposed to think of, I don’t know, the Constitution and backyard cookouts like in old Chevy ads—but for me, it’s really Gettysburg we’re celebrating. Greatest battle in American history. But the battle,…

May 30, 2010 | Comments (34)

Is Rand Paul Just Another Neocon Republicrat Masquerading As A Libertarian Rebel?

This article first appeared in Antiwar.com “When it is said that nothing, including a nuclear strike, is off the table on Iran, are those who say it not also threatening genocide?” – Rep. Ron Paul, May 22, 2007 “I don’t think…

May 25, 2010 | Comments (49)

Facebook Friends: God Died to Get Away From Us

Maybe somebody could explain Facebook to me. I’m on it and I still don’t get it. I hate it without understanding it, like a dog barking at a vacuum cleaner. Facebook’s in the news for violating people’s privacy and selling…

May 23, 2010 | Comments (67)

Top Billionaire Hedge Funder Sees Himself As a Hyena Devouring Wildebeests

This article first appeared in Alternet. Ray Dalio is a billionaire hedge fund manager who makes more money in a single day than most Americans will earn in their entire lifetimes. That’s because hedge funds are the top of the…

May 22, 2010 | Comments (62)

How PG&E Plans To Screw The Golden State By Enshrining Its Corporate Energy Monopoly In the California Constitution

First published on Alternet Welcome to Gilded Age 2.0, a time when government has become an appendage to the super-rich, used by industrialists, financiers and corporate robber barons to monopolize the economy and strip regular citizens of power and money….

May 18, 2010 | Comments (24)

The Crying Conservative: How Glenn Beck Taught His Feminine Side To Turn Tricks

The following is an adapted excerpt from Alexander Zaitchik’s book, Common Nonsense: Glenn Beck and the Triumph of Ignorance, just released by Wiley & Sons. Every July 4, Glenn Beck emcees the Stadium of Fire celebration in Provo, Utah. The…

May 14, 2010 | Comments (36)

Iron Man 2: Everything Money Can Buy

Iron Man 2 is such a huge hit, it’s clear everybody’s going to see it regardless of critical praise or condemnation. Each of us can—or will soon be able to—fulminate about why it’s good, bad, or meh. We don’t need…

May 10, 2010 | Comments (43)

Stupid, Part 5: Back to Berkeley for the Big Epiphany

This is the 5th installment of John Dolan’s work-in-progress “Stupid (Or, How To Lose Money Running A Speed Lab).” Read the previous installment “Every Flake A 20 Dollar Bill” by clicking here. Butler knelt by the beaker while the white…

May 9, 2010 | Comments (11)

Rise & Fall Of “The Washington Times” : A Tale Of Ex-Nazis, Cocaine Smugglers & Moonie Cultists Who Created Right-Wing Republican Propaganda Organ…And Brought It Crashing Down…

Black rat snake in Washington Times newsroom. This article is reprinted from Consortium News As an investigative journalist, I’m not much for catchy political metaphors, but the revelation that snakes and rodents are infesting the Washington Times building as the Rev….

May 2, 2010 | Comments (30)

Did Goldman Sachs Manipulate Journalists and Stock Price On Same Day As Senate Testimony?

A reader brought to my attention a new rumor going around about the strange behavior of Goldman Sachs’s stock price. On April 27, the day Blankfein was dragged before Congress to testify about fraud, Goldman’s stock rose–even though every other…

Apr 29, 2010 | Comments (19)

Confessions Of A Wall St. Nihilist: Forget About Goldman Sachs, Our Entire Economy Is Built On Fraud

This article first appeared in The New York Press. There was a strange moment last week during President Obama’s speech at Cooper Union. There he was, groveling before a cast of Wall Street villains including Goldman Sachs chief Lloyd Blankfein,…

Apr 28, 2010 | Comments (112)

Fraudonomics: 10 Fun Fraud Facts

A version of this article first appeared in The New York Press Ever since I got kicked out of Russia and forced back home, I’ve been collecting all kinds of news articles about fraud, in a document file titled “America…

Apr 28, 2010 | Comments (23)

Exile Classic: Schopenhauer Award #2: Flecker’s Box Jellyfish

As we explained in our last issue, the eXile has created this new feature, the Schopenhauer Award, to serve the spiritual needs of our readers. Concerned that some of you might be backsliding from pure Nihilism, we’ve come up with…

Apr 27, 2010 | Comments (19)

Mark Ames Presents Wisdom For The Ages: “Always Rush A Gun And Run From A Knife”

I came across this practical nugget of wisdom from Teamster’s Union mafia don Jimmy Hoffa, as recounted from the death bed confessions of the legendary Mafia hitman Frank “The Irishman” Sheeran: Jimmy said, “You always run away from a man…

Apr 25, 2010 | Comments (25)

A People’s History of Koch Industries: How Stalin Funded the Tea Party Movement

This article was first published on Alternet.org “I would rather live under a bridge than live under socialism” —tea bagger slogan   Everyone knows that Tea Party revolutionaries fear and hate socialism about as much as the Antichrist. Which is…

Apr 17, 2010 | Comments (109)

Dispatch from the Southern Republican Leadership Conference: Racist Hicks Speak Ebonics, Closet case Homophobes Tell Gay Jokes and Other Memorable Moments…

Story first published on AlterNet Anyone interested in taking the pulse of the GOP base in 2010 has a few options. They can watch Fox News at any hour of any day. They can trot down to their local Tea…

Apr 15, 2010 | Comments (22)

Mexican Drug War Intel Report: Over 22,000 Dead, Police Detain 27% of the Zetas’ Foot Soldiers, Open Hunting Season On Cops…

Hey there drug war fans, I got some statistics to throw your way. While you gringos pay attention to the unemployment rate and foreclosure statistics, we here in Mexico track the national kill count—how many people died, who suffered the…

Apr 14, 2010 | Comments (26)