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War Nerd: Congo Warrior Nkunda Is Nkool

Laurent Nkunda: War Nerd Hero If you ever want to find a real hero, here’s one way to recognize him: the TV news will be making him into a monster 24/7. Today’s monster hero is the Tutsi general Laurent Nkunda,…

Nov 11, 2008 | Comments (33)

Larry Summers: A Suicidal Choice

We all know in the backs of our minds that Barack Obama’s incredible victory will eventually be followed by disappointment. But does it have to come so soon, and hit so hard? The answer will be yes, if Lawrence Summers…

Nov 11, 2008 | Comments (9)

Candy Raver Russian Revolutionaries

Last weekend, a Russian anarchist revolutionary art group called War pulled a fast one on Prime Minister Putin. Or at least they thought they did. Russian revolutionaries sure do fall far from the tree these days. On the night of…

Nov 10, 2008 | Comments (1)

Watching Them Squirm: Fox News Abandons the Mob It Created

The first polls had just closed when the Republican Right’s “Agony of Defeat” moment arrived. It was just after 8 p.m. — right as Fox’s “America’s Election HQ” show returned from a commercial break, and Brit Hume welcomed viewers back…

Nov 8, 2008 | Comments (7)


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Election ‘08 Appears to Have Actually Happened

Mass psychosis? So by now you’ve probably heard something about this election that happened on Tuesday. There seemed to be a whole hoo-ha about it, people hugging and high-fiving in the streets, international rejoicing, everybody laughing and crying and gibbering….

Nov 7, 2008 | Leave Comment

About Us

Mark Ames is the founding editor of The eXile and co-editor of The eXiled. His articles have appeared in The Nation, Playboy, Daily Beast, Alternet, Radar, The New York Press, and elsewhere. He is the author of“Going Postal: Rage, Murder…

Nov 5, 2008 | Leave Comment

Daily Inquisition: Mike Williams

Today’s Defendant: Mike Williams, resident of Douglas, Arizona Statement from the Grand Inquisitor: Hard-working people all across Mexico are busting their asses for American consumers. No, we are not talking about the migrant workers cleaning your dishes, picking your grapes…

Nov 4, 2008 | Comments (2)

Daily Inquisition: Twitter Twats

Today’s Defendant: Twitter Twats Statement of the Grand Inquisitor: When you join Twitter you become able to communicate in short bursts of information with many people from your mobile phone or computer. Your phone becomes a vibrating message-whore, hemorrhaging useless…

Nov 4, 2008 | Leave Comment

Daily Inquisition: Kevin the Undecided Veuter

Statement of the Grand Inquisitor: With one day left before the election, CNN chose as its microcosm of America-at-da-crossroads one Kevin Sheen, a whey-faced Irish-American idiot from the Midwest, who coyly offers his quandriness as an “undecided” voter.

Nov 3, 2008 | Leave Comment

FILM PREVIEW: Holiday Movie Mess

Here’s a friendly warning for you: don’t count on the movies to get you through the holidays, any more than they got you through the Wall Street seizures or this gut-wrencher of an election. As bad as the movies have…

Nov 3, 2008 | Comments (1)

DAILY INQUISITION: Halloween Sarah Palins Must Pay

Statement of the Grand Inquisitor: Anyone dressing up as Sarah Palin for Halloween is condemned to waterboarding with extreme prejudice. How we’re going to manage to torture such a huge crowd of morons I don’t know—we’ll have to hire a…

Oct 31, 2008 | Leave Comment

DAILY INQUISITION: Human vs. Dog Bravery

Statement of the Grand Inquisitor: On rare occasions, certain people are brave, and must be commended.

Oct 29, 2008 | Leave Comment

War Nerd Update: Jack al-Sparrow vs. the Do-gooders!

Can I time these articles or what? The day after I put up my article on Ethiopia’s troubles in Somalia, 5 car bombs go off in two Somali cities targeting the Ethiopian consulate in Hargeisa, the Presidential Palace (such as…

Oct 29, 2008 | Comments (1)

WAR NERD: From the Rhino's Head to the Hyena's Belly

A couple of years ago I mentioned that Ethiopian troops were occupying Mogadishu and said it was the perfect experimental setup for us. Now we could find out if anybody could pacify that place. Well, the answer’s in, because the…

Oct 28, 2008 | Comments (1)

DAILY INQUISITION: White America Achieves Perfection

Today’s Defendant: White America Statement of the Grand Inquisitor: Today we write in praise of White America. It’s long overdue, says Frank Rich, the New York Times columnist. He wrote a recent article called “In Defense of White America” in…

Oct 28, 2008 | Leave Comment

DAILY INQUISITION: Animal Righteousness

Today’s Defendant: When Animals Attack! Statement of the Grand Inquisitor: There used to be this tremendously moral show on TV back in the 1990s called When Animals Attack! It was all about how you should respect animals or else suffer…

Oct 27, 2008 | Comments (1)

FILM REVIEW: The Depression and High School Musical 3

No way. Actually, I refuse to review High School Musical 3. We all know it’s rotten. Which brings me to my point: where the hell are the movies? I mean the ones for mass audiences, designed to make sentient beings…

Oct 27, 2008 | Leave Comment

The Daily Inquisition: Ashley Todd

The Damnation of Ashley Todd Statement of the Grand Inquisitor: Little need be said here. What does a Texas Republican know about stigmata? What could an Anglo-Saxon understand about self-mutilation?

Oct 24, 2008 | Leave Comment

The New Cold War's Premature Ejaculation

You may not have noticed it, but a couple of weeks ago, the New York Times slipped in a story that completely contradicted a narrative that it had been building up for two straight months, one that was leading America into…

Oct 23, 2008 | Comments (1)

Daily Inquisition: You Can't Win

The Good Book: You Can’t Win Statement of the Grand Inquisitor: There are few good books. You Can’t Win by Jack Black, a forgotten memoir of the 1920s is a very good book. For that, we honor it. This Jack Black…

Oct 23, 2008 | Comments (2)