Stop the presses! Christopher Hitchens just noticed that waterboarding is torture! Hitchens announced the news like he’d brought it down from Mount Sinai, in a Vanity Fair article. “Believe me,” he told a waiting nation, “it’s torture.” Well, yeah. It…

Do you still crave the perennial favorites you’ve come to know and love and worship from the original eXile site but find yourself unable to leave the comfy confines of The eXiled? Well, we’d like to help.

It’s been only two days, and already we’ve received dozens of shamelessly fawning letters from readers around the world. For this inaugural [sic], we’ve invited media celebrity Tony Snow

According to Pulitzer Prize-seeking reporter Clifford Levy of the New York Times, Russia still turns off its hot water to apartments for a month every summer. It’s the kind of scoop that has made Levy a star

Gov. Sergei Morozov baptizes a UAZ-Patriot, the grand prize for one lucky newborn’s family. ULYANOVSK, Russia—On a humid Sunday afternoon in late June, about 100 couples clutching newborn babies filed into the Lenin Memorial overlooking the wide banks of the Volga River. This…

A 20-year-old in Yaroslavl does a back-flop off a 70 ft high bridge on a dare, breaks his back upon entry and sinks to the bottom of Volga like a stone. His friends catch the whole thing—including his last puffs…

Just in case you missed this kickass interview with Gary Brecher on Wisconsin Public Radio

The eXiled Coat of Arms Is Back With A Vengeance One month ago, our newspaper The eXile got stomped into extinction by some ham-fisted Russian government officials, who decided that since there’s a new president in the Kremlin who’s talking…

War & Drugs: flying while you’re dying Hey, I’m back! For a few weeks there, the War Nerd was unhorsed, pulled over to the side watching life’s rich convoy zoom by. Thanks to the damn ungrateful Russian government, the old…

Limonov’s next move: organize Russia’s ex-cons Russian summer is short and unpredictable. The only thing that is predictable about Russian summer is that it is short. Usually, the month of May is cold, July is hot and August looks like…

Welcome to Nashestvie, Russia’s largest open-air Russian rock festival. It is held annually around Moscow, this year in Tver. Can’t you just feel the love?

Launch in t-minus 10 hours and counting… Thanks to the donations from our readers, who’ve done God’s work by pitching in to keep The eXile nightmare alive, we are finally crawling out of our mass grave. As many of you…

The eXiled is a webzine that publishes political commentary, pop culture criticism and investigative reporting from around the world—all of it written in The eXiled’s infamous satirical and outrageous style. The eXiled has been online since June 2008 as the…

They’re looking for us! As you know, we’ve been fucked over for good in Russia. “Why they done gone ‘n do that?” you ask in your innocent/retarded Deliverance way? Well, we’re too busy hiding from the FSB

I cry no more. Thank you…

EXILED ONLINE POWER SEARCH: Search everything eXile from one easy location!

FRESNO, CA – It’s summer, you’ve got a little more time off, so you can read up on war instead of trying to live in whatever boring suburb you live in. Lawns, neighbors, dogs, kids—it all sucks and the best…

Iraq Police Academy 6: Doin’ The Mosul Shuffle! FRESNO, CA — OK, we’ve just gone through a really exciting time in world military moves, so let’s test your strategic IQ. What’s the relation between these three recent developments: 1. On…

A map of Zhukov’s attack on Japan’s Imperial Army bears a strange resemblance to the inner jaws of those giant sandworms in Dune How the Japs got served with the 3,000-mile long Stalin Roll combo Everybody knows about the Fall…

This is the cover of The eXile Issue #288, published in May 2008.

Photographic evidence of Tibet’s military, circa 1950 FRESNO, CA — Writing a column on the military history of Tibet seemed like a good idea in the good old days, a week ago, before I started actually trying to research it….

This is the cover of Issue #287 of The eXile, published in April of 2008.

This article was first published in The eXile, April 2008 Last summer, The eXile took a safari journey in search of the legendary Gopniki, Russia’s underworld answer to the OGs of South Central, Long Beach, and the Bronx. Those notorious…

Klein on Columbian TV a few months before his arrest in Moscow Two weeks ago, while all eyes were focused on the case of international arms dealer Viktor Bout, I spent about five hours at the Moscow City Court watching…